I have an excellent, over-the-top, heightened sense of smell.
This innate ability to pick up on even the hint of fragrance can be a blessing or a curse…depending on the situation.
If a moth commits Hara Kiri by flying directly into the halogen bulb in our living room floor lamp, I’ll be the one who says, (sniff) “Something’s burning….(sniff, sniff)…can you smell that? What is that? Is the stove on? I THINK SOMETHING IS ON FIRE. Hel-lo? Why isn’t anyone concerned about this??” Meanwhile, that moth is toast….and I don’t mean in a good way.
The flip side is when a shopping companion does a drive-by-spritz from the display counter at Macy’s. I’ll enjoy the first whiff…and then I’m simultaneously gagging and backing away. Ultimately the spritz-offender will be coerced into hitting the ladies room, where I will hose her down until the felonious odor has been eradicated. Only then may harmonious shopping resume.
And I wonder why people are hesitant to go shopping with me…
Growing up, I can remember Mom wearing the perfume Charlie. Mom was a teacher…and regularly received several bottles of the stuff during each school-year holiday season. So, she wore it…she may have preferred not to….but hell, what else was she gonna do with it? I have a teeny bottle somewhere…tightly sealed…and every now and then I’ll take a whiff and be instantly swept back to that five-year-old...sitting on her mother’s lap…while she read “Are You My Mother?” to me for the thousandth time.
This reminded me of how much I still love the smell of crayons…and the smell of Play Doh…and the ocean and freshly cut grass and lilacs and how Laura reminded me the other day that Mom always had marigolds growing in the garden…and she can’t smell ‘em now without thinking of her.
Sigh…. We miss Mom...
This got me to thinking about what smells da boys will associate with me after I’m gone. I figure the smell of burned food is probably not a very nice association…(may I rest in peace).
Then I realized what smell they’ll remember…and I’m realizing their memories are gonna be just a tad…confusing. See, I’m a huge fan of the body butters from The Body Shop. These are serious moisturizers for seriously dry skin…like mine. They come in a myriad of scents…from coconut (reminiscent of Coppertone Coconut Tanning Oil), to shea butter…to mango...to cocoa butter. They’re light and subtle and…yummy. Loving the body butters so much, the next time I found myself in The Body Shop, I decided to try their banana-scented shampoo and conditioner…and my free gift that day included some grapefruit scented/flavored lip balm.
Somehow, having all these differing scents on me has rendered me unable to recognize that I almost certainly smell like someone threw up an entire basket of fruit.
Maybe this is a good thing….I’ve covered an entire gamut of produce in an effort to be memorialized in every conceivable venue…from weddings to barbecues...I’ll be there.
And I guess that makes me golden…