Sunday, May 30, 2010

Say What?

The holiday weekend is underway here in Kathrynville…



…and the occasional misunderstandings are bound to occur.

Yesterday, I ran into my neighbor….a lovely gentleman whose wife has just returned home from the hospital. After I ran him over with my car (get it? I ran into him? Too lame??), I inquired as to the well-being of his spouse. He responded with, “Eh.”

I then inquired if he needed anything whilst I was out, since I was already driving away and all…

He quickly pulled his foot out of the way and responded (with what I assumed was a smirk) that “some alcohol would do nicely”.

So, I did what any good neighbor would do: I left a nice bottle of Cab on his front stoop. An hour later, he stood on my front stoop…a confused smile on his face. Turns out, he meant rubbing alcohol….so he could cleanse his wife’s wound.

Oh. I guess that makes sense, too…

I found him some actual rubbing alcohol and told him to keep the Cab. I think we’re now BFFs.

Cheers, all....let the holiday weekend continue...

Straight Guy said...

I should say so. You came through on two counts. I'll ask you to pick me up some "dough" and we'll just see what happens...

Carol said...

Easy mistake. And he probably appreciated the alcohol more than you know. I can see him now, cleaning the wound and sipping Cab from a sippy cup. That's what I would do.

Fierce said...

Hey I'm sure you ended up helping him kill 2 birds with one stone (or neighbor). I'm with straight guy, I'd really like some "dough", and maybe some "green" too.

;)
xoxo

lifelove'n'wine said...

Haha, too funny! Thanks for sharing:)

Lauren said...

hahaha! Go you! So... what's he going to leave on your doorstep in thanks? I think this could turn out to be very interesting.

Jerry said...

Is this the way you make friends? Run over them then booze 'em up? I'll bet he is a friend for life now.

sage said...

Pretty funny!

Oddyoddyo13 said...

Is it wrong to laugh at that? If so, sorry! If not, hahahaahahaa!!

Honestly though, what did he think you thought?

~:C:~ said...

ROTFL

I am SO moving in next door.

Gillian said...

LMFAO....thats hysterical.

The Cab would've done just as well...why didn't he just shut his mouth and swig it.

Alan W. Davidson said...

Well that worked out well in the end. First impressions are always a bit dodgy. Sounds like you did OK. Maybe.

ValleyWriter said...

Ha ha ha - that's a riot! I would've thought the same thing. Might've gone for vodka though - I think that would've worked nicely for *all* medicinal purposes ;-)

Spot said...

Wait! What?! You can't clean a wound with Cab?! Now you tell me!!

That's too funny. I'm sure you are BFF's. I'm BFF's with anyone who brings me free alcohol or tells me I look to young to have teenagers.

Funny post!
♥Spot

Maureen@IslandRoar said...

Seriously, you may have saved his life. Cuz drinking rubbing alcohol just can't be good for him!
What?
Oh, he wasn't going to drink it?? Well now you've got him covered from all sides, don't you?
I wish you were my neighbor...

kathryn said...

Straight Guy: Oh, you are such a card...whole wheat or bran? 'Cause the only ppl I know that call it "dough" are in the mafia. Ya gotta anything ya wanna tell me? Hmmm?

Carol: Oh, I love this! Only, let's replace the sippy cup with one of those Dunkin Donuts coffee things with the lid...so wifey'll think he's trying to keep alert whilst he cleanses her wounds do diligently. (His singing may give him away, though...)

Fierce: Okay, so I'll pick you up some flour and water AND something sickly-looking, jealous and un-ripe...that'll cover the green. That should cover it!

kathryn said...

lifelove'n'wine: You're very welcome, sweetie. I figure I've made a memorable first impression, right?

Lauren: HA! Well, where do you go from here...and still keep it legal??

Jerry: Oh, you slay me...you honestly do. Now, every time I see that guy step back off the curb when he sees me coming, I'll fondly think of YOU.

kathryn said...

sage: Well, yeah....funny NOW. More or less CONFUSING then!

Oddyoddyo13: If it's wrong to laugh, you've got a lot of company, sweetie! I'm guessing at that moment, wine was not high on his agenda...but we know what I was thinking....

~:C:~ Hey you...I'll missed you! HA! I'll have to start buying booze by the case. ('Cause...((ahem))...of course, I don't do that now....) Ahem.

kathryn said...

Gillian: HA! You could see in his eyes that he was genuinely torn! I guess he didn't want to accept the gift under false pretenses...(and then STILL ask me for rubbing alcohol!)

Alan W. Davidson: Wow. You can move next-door to me anytime...now that I know you're okay with being side-swiped by my car every now and then. (Um. Will that be red or white?)

ValleyWriter: You are so right! Somehow, he just seemed to...fragile for vodka...what with a sick wife at home and all. My logic: Wine=happy/tipsy. Hard stuff: blitzville. I'm sooooo logical that way....

kathryn said...

Spot: Um. Didn't I mention this after the time we tried to flush out that paper cut with a glass of tequila? Remember? I learned some new expletives from you that day....

Let's just hope the guy isn't too sleep deprived to remember which one you drink and which one you don't.

Kristy said...

That's exactly what I would have done! Alcohol? Absolutely, why not?! Wine is the first thing that comes to MY mind! :)

kathryn said...

Maureen@IslandRoar: Aw! If we lived next-door to each other, we could go halfsies on all the alcohol we leave on people's stoops and could split the hospital bills for them if we screw up. I say, "Let's do it!"

Kristy: Ha! It seemed perfectly reasonable to me. I mean, what's the first thing you'd want to do after arriving home from the hospital? Cleanse some wound....or have a little drinkie-poo?

John McElveen said...

Truth is so much funnier than Fiction--GREAT STORY!!! I wonder if she got a SHOT--ar ar....

Also tells us to communicate better--I would have thought the same thing you did!

John

kathryn said...

John McElveen: What cracks me up is that virtually everyone (everyone here, at least) made the same assumption as I! So, what gives? Are we a bunch of alcoholics who'd rather have a snort than cleanse a wound?
.....................................
Give me a minute...I'm still thinking...

Dreamfarm Girl said...

such a great neighbor you are! I would never think of "rubbing alcohol" if someone said they needed "alcohol"! I think you have made a friend for life. Or as my bloggy friend at Country Gone City calls it, a freighbor.

Bernadine said...

Hi Kathryn

My comment is late as always.

I had a big laugh at this post you know. At least you were friendly. Buying him that bottle and all although he only needed the cleaning alcohol. :)

Hope you had a nice long weekend and a nice Memorial day yesterday. We here in SA had to work as usual. :)You should enjoy your day, Kathryn

Tinkerschnitzel said...

I would have thought Vodka. If you ask for alcohol, I expect the drinkable kind. Yes, you can always be my neighbor. :)

KellyGrrl said...

HA! That's awesome!

diane rene said...

HA!! shows you where your mind was at ;0)

John McElveen said...

I'm sorry Kathryn..... uhhhh,

What were you saying?

(snicker)

J

TC said...

OH, how funny!! I had to buy a new bottle of crown royal this week and got to tell my daughter who just happened to be in the other checkout line that I was going to drink it ALL BY MYSELF. She doesn't drink, works for the school, you get the picture...
And a good time was had by all.

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