Thursday, April 1, 2010

Déjà vu

Does this ever happen to you?

You’re working on the computer. You think, “The dog’s snoring is really distracting. Some music would be nice.” And you walk out of your office and into your master to turn on some tunes.

As you pass your open door, you hear the dog scratching to go out. So you walk all the way down the stairs…and you attach his leash and send him out (remember the handy-dandy dog-walking method??)



…and halfway back up the stairs, you remember the laundry…so you walk the rest of the way down and transfer the load from the washer to the dryer.

On the way past the kitchen, you see the dog’s water bowl is empty so you fill it. While you're at the sink, you see that Taylor’s left his dish in the sink…so (insert heavy sigh here) you rinse it and place it in the dishwasher.

Then you yell, “TAYLOR! YOU LEFT YOUR DIRTY DISH IN THE SINK! I AM NOT YOUR MAID AND DO YOU WANT US TO HAVE EVEN MORE ANTS???!”…but you yell in the daintiest, most lady-like way, of course. This is met with utter silence.

You then walk down the hall, passing the bath…and debate whether you have to pee. “I’ll bet I could pee if I tried,” you think. As you're washing your hands, you notice the half-inch of grey hair on top of your head and you wonder when the last time was you colored your hair. For this information, you need to check the calendar…which is in your office. However, as you're heading there you hear Metro bark to be let back in. (You've yet to figure out a way for him to do this on his own. Can’t he take a class for this…like those cats that can pee on the toilet?)

As you're letting the dog back in, a puff of cold air blows on your face and your lips feel chapped so you head to the master in search of Chapstick. That’s when you hear the *CHIME!* that says you have a new email message, so you sit down in front of your computer and proceed to check your messages.

That’s when you realize that your lips are still chapped, so you reach for your office-copy of Chapstick (‘cause you need one for every room) and you sigh in satisfaction…as you hit “reply” and begin typing.

Ten minutes later you think, “The dog’s snoring is really distracting. Some music would be nice.” And you walk out of your office and into the master to turn on some tunes...

...Or is it just me??

Gigi said...

LOL!!! You have just described my life to a T. Except I don't have a dog, and I'm not addicted to Chapstick. But other than that - it's my life!

Gigi said...

Oh my hell. I'm the first to respond. Do I get a prize? I feel like I should!

Oddyoddyo13 said...

Pretty sure its just you, but hey, I wouldn't know since I'd probably have forgotten the whole thing by that point.

Kimberly said...

Not just you. Believe me. I need to start putting sticky notes on my forehead so I'll remember what I went into the kitchen (or wherever) for. But then I'd have to remember to read the sticky note. Ugh!

And I have both the dog and the Chapstick addiction! One in every room, baby! :)

Dreamfarm Girl said...

That is me, too! Whenever I am home, I think I spend all day going back and forth across the house, starting out on one mission and quickly getting sidetracked onto another. I especially like the deep sigh. [deep sigh] it's such a Such is Life sigh. and PS, great dog walking technique!

WannabeVirginia W. said...

I am pretty sure that is just you. Just kidding.

I have so done the handy dandy walk the dog thingy but only if there is the possibility of a skunk in my yard. Long story.

WannabeVirginia W. said...

P.S. sometimes, I have done that huge brain fart while driving and say to myself "where the hell was I going?" Pretty frightening.

The Expatresse said...

LOL!

I sometimes look around the room for clues as to why I am in there.

Tina said...

Distraction stops writing and provides material for writing. Damn quandries. Damn laundry too.

The Clean White Page

ValleyWriter said...

That's me... plus those times when you walk into a room and say to yourself "wait, why did I come here?" Oy Vey!

Maureen@IslandRoar said...

Okay, you can remove that camera you've obviously placed in my home. It's not that we have ADD; we just have too much crap to do...

JP said...

If you give a mom a muffin, she'll want a cup of coffee to go with it. She'll pour herself some. Her three-year-old will spill the coffee. She'll wipe it up. Wiping the floor, she will find dirty socks. She'll remember she has to do laundry. When she puts the laundry in the washer, she'll trip over boots and bump into the freezer. Bumping into the freezer will remind her she has to plan supper. She will get out a pound of hamburger. She'll look for her cookbook. (101 Things To Make With A Pound Of Hamburger.) The cookbook is sitting under a pile of mail. She will see the phone bill, which is due tomorrow. She will look for her checkbook. The checkbook is in her purse that is being dumped out by her two-year-old. She'll smell something funny. She'll change the two-year-old. While she is changing the two-year-old the phone will ring. Her five-year-old will answer and hang up. She'll remember that she wants to phone a friend to come for coffee. Thinking of coffee will remind her that she was going to have a cup. She will pour herself some. And chances are, if she has a cup of coffee, her kids will have eaten the muffin that went with it.

by Kathy Fictorie

Spot said...

Wow. I snort laughed some coffee while I was reading this! Thanks for nearly drowning me in a beverage. You've just described my life. Except my dog lives outside. It's my cats that get me.

Hilarious post!!
♥Spot

Chrissy said...

This is so funny! And so true. I'm very easily distracted so this happens to me all the time.

Thaydra said...

ALL the time, Sweetie. ALL the time. At work, home, everywhere.

Wendy Blum said...

Oh, woman I DO THAT SO MUCH!! I thought it was just ME and I had adult ADHD or senility was creeping in. I'll start in one room of my home with intentions of starting something there, get side tracked with something else in the room and proceed to do that thing, that will set me off thinking of something related to the first thing I came into the room for and I will go into another room to take care of that and so on and so on....I swear to heaven I should weigh a scant 90 pounds from all the 'room aerobics' I do. Cause I don't know about you but all that wandering from room to room feels like a workout to me when I FINALLY get to lay down at the end of my day! Then it will commence the next day only begin in a different room LOL.

Wendy Blum said...

HA HA HEE HEE!! LOVE JP's comment. We have the book If You Give A Moose A Muffin and the other related books in the series. What hoot! And ALL TOO TRUE =D

Kristy said...

Oh, yeah, totally have this problem. Although sometimes when I reflect on it, I think it helps me get a lot done around the house. And you know what? A man does not do this. They walk with a single minded mission (God forbid they could do anything that approaches multitasking). Ok, I'll stop before I go too far!

Fierce said...

Ok if I that happened to me, I would totally call shenanigans! I have a dog named Metro and a son named Connor; sounds like a body swap to me. Add on top of that some deja vu? That is just plain freaky!!! Could be an interesting experience though.

:)
xoxo

Lauren said...

Oh goodness... that has happened to me. Usually at work when I'm getting six or seven things shouted at me all at once. Isn't it just maddening? And confusing? I NEED CHAPSTICK! Thanks for the reminder -leaves computer to write chapstick on grocery list-

Selina Kingston said...

Such a great post! You know that half inch of grey? That's what causes it !!!

Heather said...

LOL! AND here we go around again...
LMAO!

~:C:~ said...

Isn't it sad that dishes need to be washed before being placed in a dishwasher? That's one of the reasons I no longer have a dishwasher. teeheehee

Ang said...

OMG!!! I think about 80% of all women have moments like this.

Smileyfreak said...

'I bet I could pee if I tried'

hahahahaha so funny!! thanks for the read,that happens all the time.
I'll go into the kitchen for a drink and a break from study maybe and next thing I know I'm making my sister a snack and washing potatoes for dinner.Half an hour later and I'm still in the kitchen :)

Jerry said...

How can you so accurately describe our household. It's uncanny.

I really loved this...probably because I live it.

Gay Guy said...

Kathryn,

I had that day yesterday. On top of it, I had to redo a patch of cleaning. I was putting away the vacuum and saw that the bag-less dirt catcher disgusting thing was full. I could hear myself thinking: "I'm really pressed for time so I should just wait to clean that next time." Next thing I knew, I was yanking it out of the vacuum. What a mess. Next thing I knew, I was cleaning again. A mess.

uo-chan said...

oh kathryn your so funny ^_^ im back and with pictures they will be up shortly i missed you all ^^

Tinkerschnitzel said...

Here I was thinking I had ADD or something. Nope. A good portion of my weekend went this way, hence the trimming of the holly bushes. :D

kathryn said...

Gigi: Oh, I'm SO GLAD it's not just ME. You may have the prize of my eternal devotion...(What do you mean, "That's not good enough"??)

Oddyoddyo13: HA! Good answer, sweetie! I think you're more like me than you realize....(and that's a good thing, right??)

Kimberly: Oh! A fellow Chapstick-lovah! My lips are so dry, they'll get to the point where they sting. Painful!

kathryn said...

Dreamfarm Girl: Yeah...I'm big on the deep sighing. It covers a multitude of ironies, right? Can you imagine what color my grass is in a 10-ft perimeter outside my front door? (It greens up eventually...)

WannabeVirginiaW: HA! I laughed out loud at your PS about driving and forgetting where you're going! That's some serious brain fart!!

The Expatresse: Oh, yeah? How's that clue-thing working out for you? I've tried that...I've tried re-tracing my steps....nada.

kathryn said...

Tina: I hear that. It's a double-edged sword. Today, I've gotten up a handful of times to turn on my tunes...then the phone'll ring and I'll shut them off and the endless loop starts all over again.

ValleyWriter: It's maddening, I tell ya! It makes me feel like I'm losing it. Worst yet is when you NEVER REMEMBER why you came in....

Maureen@IslandRoar: HA! I know, sweetie...I do believe that sometimes you and I are leading parallel lives!

kathryn said...

JP: Oh, this is hilarious! Don't you just love when stores like this travel full circle? It's the 'ole "Give the Mouse a Cookie" for the grown-ups...

Spot: HA! I'm glad I could provide a laugh for you, sweetie. You've returned the favor oh-so-many times!

Chrissy: Honey, you're not alone. I suppose it could be worse...but I don't know quite how... What were we talking about?

kathryn said...

Thaydra: HA! It's nice to know I'm in good company! Makes me feel a little less....insane!

Wendy Blum: I swear...we're all carbon copies of each other! And yes, I have to agree...all that remembering and up and down the stairs SHOULD translate over into some serious weight loss.....and yet, NOT!

Kristy: I know, I know! And yes...we're always getting something done, just not the thing we set out to do! THEN we come across as scatterbrained. Grrrrr.

kathryn said...

Fierce: Honey, I don't think you'd seriously wanna do a life-swap! Although, I'd be willing to lend you Metro-the-Wonderdog...till his snoring drives you to distraction...and then you'll promptly give him back!

Lauren: Another Chapstick devotee! Yay! I buy 'em in that 8-pack whenever I see them...don't you love when you twist 'em at the end and you're scraping your lips, trying to get it on??

Selina Kingston: HA! Stupid grey...I started going grey in my early 20's...what a PITA. I want to know how my hair isn't down to my BUTT by now, if it grows this fast at my scalp!

kathryn said...

Heather: Uh huh...and round and round we go! It's practically dizzying!

~:C:~ Well, it's true! Ya know the really sad part? When I'm emptying the dishwasher, if there's food still stuck to something, I put it back in to be washed again.

Ang: But...it's not our fault! I mean, we can't have selective vision, right?? (Can we? Sometimes, that would be great!!)

kathryn said...

Smileyfreak: Well, there you go...you know exactly what I'm talking about! And the peeing thing is just good sense....

Jerry: Hey, I'm just calling 'em as I see 'em. In my mind, I'm pointing out the obvious...whilst simultaneously praying that I'm not alone in doing it!

Gay Guy: So, you were basically cleaning the vacuum. I wish I could say I cannot relate...but, alas. I was so proud of myself when I bought that bagless, filterless vacuum...not realizing the downside. You're much better than I, GG...I'll swear up, down and sideways that I'll do it....next time.

kathryn said...

uo-chan: Thank you, sweetie! Glad you're home safe! Looking forward to hearing all about your trip!

Tinkerschnitzel: Uh-huh...and hence your swollen hands today! I'll bet you can't make a fist...am I right??

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