Monday, December 6, 2010

These Boots Are Made for Walking

Today, I’d like to query everyone about their average running temperature. I used to believe that guys generally ran hot and girls ran cold.

However, I now realize this is not necessarily the case.

Clinton Kelly
Clinton Kelly (My always superbly-dressed, except when he’s not, IV): “Speak for yourself. I am definitely one hot dude. I’m hot one hundred percent of the time. Even when I’m a mess, I’m one hot mess.”

Kathryn: “That’s all well and good…but I did not inquire as to your hot-ness factor. The question was to my readers. But thanks for the interruption.”

CK: “You’re welcome. Is that what you’ve been wearing to work?”

K: (Wary) “Um. Yeah…they keep the temperature in my office at…like, 78 degrees. It’s a freakin’ oven in there.”

CK: “Is anyone else roasting, besides you?”

K: “Well…no. But that doesn’t mean anything. I must have a better metabolism than everyone else.”

CK: “Higher.”

K: “Higher? Wait…what?”

CK: (Sighs) “You must have a higher metabolism. Your metabolism can’t be better…”

K: “Uh huh. All I know is that they’re wearing heavy cable-knit sweaters and arm-warmers with the fingers cut out and I’m sitting there in a tank top. It’s freaky. Something’s not right.”

CK: (Folds arms) “So, all your co-workers are dressed like Nanook of the North and you’re the only one dressed like the fourth of July. Does this tell you something?”

K: “Yes, oh wise one. It tells me that they need some kind of warm-up program…maybe some jumping jacks, or running in place…but preferably on the other side of the building, so they don’t make my area any hotter.”

CK: “…Because you’re already hot enough.”

K: “EXACTLY. Now we’re on the same page.”

CK: “Are you telling me that you drive to work in a tank top? Are you wearing sandals as well?”

K: “Of course not. That would be insane. I have a jacket over my tank and a winter coat over my jacket…and I wear these kick-ass boots that I wind up kicking off ‘cause they make my feet hot. I think tonight I’ll get a little pedi so I can bring some flippies to work tomorrow.”

CK: “So you’re really talking about the actual temperature with regards to your hot-ness?”

K: “Well…yeah. What did you think I was talking about, Mr. Hot Mess?”

CK: (Sighs) “Okay. I take it back.”

K: “Yeah, you do….I’m so embarrassed for you. Now. Hand me that pumice stone, will you? I heard the sun might come out tomorrow…it’s gonna be a scorcher.”

How’s the temperature in your neck of the woods? Anyone else running hot, like me??

Unknown said...

Can you send me some of your warmth?? I am always FREEZING at work! Winter, Spring, Summer or Fall - I always have my gloves and a blanket ready. It's not every day that I feel like I might turn into a popsicle - but I never know when it will be really cold. I think they have a temperature control issue, because I'm not the only one with a blanket (several other women - and only the women - have them). The men never seem cold, though...
Oh - did I mention I have a space heater, too? Yeah - it's bad!

Full-On-Forward said...



eITHER THAT.... Damn, see you got me doing the CLA!!!

I need a Ghille Suit!


Full-On-Forward said...

Yheti, a Ghillie Suit may make me hot--but my arse would be invisible to the Ladies!


Anonymous said...

As you can probably guess, Canada is very cold; I mean, cold enough that I never want to get out of bed ever. But alas, I must get things done, including my final exams. Can I have your metabolism for the next two weeks? Oh and your boots...


kathryn said...

ValleyWriter: Really? You're that cold?? One of the women in my office has a space heater as well. I think I would die if the gal next to me got one. Are you cold everywhere else as well? Or just there? I mean, is hubby comfy at home...or are you sweating him out of the house??

John McElveen: Thyroid? Is it my freakin' thyroid that's the problem?? Crap! I hadn't thought of that! Honey, you'd be waaay to dangerous with a ghille suit. Even *I* know that!!

Fierce: Yeah...I'll admit, I blame you Canadians for most of our arctic air...whether it comes down from you or not. You know it's nothing personal, right? I'll send you a little New Yawk heat-blast...but you'll have to hit DSW for the boots. I'm not giving them up!

Oddyoddyo13 said...

Currently? YES. Very hot. Scalding. Absolutely burning.

(I do hope you know me well enough to realize that was sarcasm.)

I'm with Clinton: What are you crazy?! It's, like, so totally forty-one degrees here in the morning! You're lucky I crawled out of my nice warm bed just to get to my computer!

(Nice boots though. :))

Straight Guy said...

Our office is moody, too. You need a sweater in the summer. People have space heaters under their desks to combat the AC. How crazy is that?

Gigi said...

I know the answer to your problem. It's all about the vents. You have a vent that is blowing right at you. Have them re-direct the vent and you'll be fine. But do it now - otherwise this summer you'll be the one wearing the cable knit sweater and finger-less gloves.

I know from personal experience.

As for here? Here it is FREAKIN' freezing! We even had snow already. SNOW! In the South. What's the world coming to?

diane rene said...

it's so cal :) I'm still in jeans and layers - a short sleeved shirt under a jacket. upper 60s during the day, low 40s over night. it's supposed to hit 78 this week tho ;0)

but normally, me personally? I'm always at an extreme ... but I have no thyroid and my meds are ... eh. the summer time kills me and I have to jump in the pool to cool off, winters I pull out the flannel sheets and wear socks to bed. go figure

injaynesworld said...

I'm always cold. Apparently, I have no blood. I, too, love CK. I want to be bffs with him.

Lauren said...

It's freezing here and it's been snowing nonstop for like two days. On average I tend to always be cold. Though it really depends on where I am. They have an absolutely ridiculous heating system at school. I think the AC is still on in some classes.

Unknown said...

I too run hot but I do believe it must be this age in my life that is from the pits of Hades. DH is in 3 layers at home while I am in my tank and flip flops.

Slamdunk said...

My last office experience was a scorcher--I needed a cold shower 12 months out of the year as hot as my office stayed.

Cool boots by the way.

Alicia said...

You would love my office then's super cold. I'm freezing all day long. I wear leg warmers over my thick socks and a sweater all day long. I have a little heater under my desk which is usually on most of the day.

The other women in my office are always complaining they're hot...but they all kinda look like that ghillie suit creature. But I'm always cold, work or home or car or restaurant or anywhere else.

But have that thyroid thing checked, just in case.

Full-On-Forward said...

kathryn-- #1 Hormones-- #2- Thyroid!

Have them both checked!

What r u insinuating my Dear!!!


Do you know how to make a Hormone?

Don't pay her!

j.m. neeb said...

I'm usually cold.

(Sorry, no witty commenting today. Not feeling well...)

Kelly@MentalGarbage said...

I'm always on the cold side during the day, but WAY warm at night... I keep my heater turned down to 62 so that it won't kick on while I'm sleeping... And my husband is the opposite - warm all day, cold at night...

Unknown said...

Hmmm.... well it is SMOKIN' hot in my office building too. It was almost 30C in there the other day. Normal room temp is 21C. Groooossss!

But, unlike most people I don't have a 'normal' temp. Sometimes I am cold and sometimes way too hot. Depends on what's going on around me. Perhaps I'm cold blooded??? lol

Gay Guy said...

Oh, that kind of "guys are hot" hot.

Kristy @Loveandblasphemy said...

I'm the silly ninny wearing a sweater in the building because I always think it is cold. I only like to be cool when I'm sleeping, I guess. I think I am just finicky in general. I do not like being too cold. I do not like being too hot.

kathryn said...

Oddyoddyo13: Aw. (Goes to give Dani a hug and winds up giving her a *SHOCK* instead) Oops...sorry about that. Just another downside to winter. You and Clinton are failing to take into account that my metabolism is better, (I mean, faster) than all of yours. It's not my fault. It's 41 degrees there?? WHY is it so cold? What happened to global warming??

Straight Guy: That sounds like an arctic nightmare. I don't suppose it's toasty in the winter?? You must have a polar bear in a senior position. Or, it's someone with a better metabolism. One or the other.

Gigi: Oh, wise one...what would I do without you? I know! I'd continue to roast! I cannot believe you've had the "S" word. Even we haven't had that...yet. It's high time we invested in that condo on the beach, sweets. WTH are we waiting for??

kathryn said...

diane rene: (Sigh) Southern California...I wonder what that must be like. Oh, wait-you just told me! 78 degrees sounds positively gorgeous for outside...with a breeze thrown in....and an ocean view. Come to think of it, can I come stay with you? Just till April or so? I'll make pie.

injaynesworld: You're cold, even in the summer? I'm guessing the A/C gets you chilly. I will share CK with you. I'm sure he won't mind. We all have the same sense of humor, anyway...

Lauren: Well, I'll tell you what everyone tells me when I bitch (I mean, express myself) about winter: You do know where you live, right? I honestly hate when ppl tell me this, so I have a deep-seated need to pass it on.

Gigi said...

I hear Aruba is nice this time of year! I'll get the brochures - you pack the margarita maker!

Mark Price said...

I always run a little hot. However since shedding 30+ lbs. (Thats right) I have been able to wear coats and stuff this winter. YAY! I actually bought myself a new jacket recently. Its very leathery and wonderful. I call it my midlife jacket. (wife got a boyfriend and a new apartment, I got a jacket) So maybe my days of running hot are coming to an end...I hope not, I rather enjoy being hot!

kathryn said...

Tami: But. Then, this is a temporary thing? Or is it a female thing?? I mean, honestly...I'm glad I'm not freezing. I don't consider this to be a punishment 'cause I'm partial to tanks and flippies. I believe it makes us appear younger.

Slamdunk: Aw, man...that sounds horrible. Have you noticed that not one person has remarked that their office temperature is perfect? Not one. you think there's a conspiracy to keep us from being comfortable at work?

Alicia: Wow. So, you're pretty much cold...all the time? And you live in California. I remember you mentioning the leg warmers! You're that lady that single-handedly brought them back into fashion, right? They do look awfully cute on you, missy!

kathryn said...

John McElveen: That is the worst joke I've ever heard. Well, okay...the worst one I've heard today. (And I'm sorry...but wouldn't she YELL if you didn't pay her? I'm just saying...)

j.m. neeb: Aw. I'm sorry you're under the weather. There's definitely a lot of crap going around. Consider it paying your dues for the ONE winter virus you're willing to accept and now you'll be home-free for the rest of the winter. Hope you feel better soon, my friend.

KellyGrrl: Oh, that's funny! So, you're throwing the covers off and he's staying warm and toasty. See? You balance each other out!

kathryn said...

SMOOG! I was JUST talking about you to someone in my office today. It's like you've read my freakin' mind. I'm sorry I'm having so much trouble visiting everyone. (Hangs head) Ya know I still love ya, right?? Well, your temp sounds like mine. We are women of extremes...too hot to handle, or cold as ice!

Gay Guy: LOL. Sorry, sweetie. Didn't mean to get your hopes up. I know how disappointing it can be when you're expecting some eye candy.'s me. You know how I can be...

Kristy: I feel the same way. That's why I'm really only happy when it's 70 degrees, and sunny...with a slight breeze, no humidity and no bugs. I don't think that's unreasonable at all. Do you?

Runnergirl said...

I am totally the opposite - always freakin freezing when everyone else is warm! My Summer is a nightmare as I have to plan my wardrobe really carefully to account for the fact that it's warm outside, but I am cold in the office with the aircon!

You are pretty hot though...

Selina Kingston said...

We have minus temperatures here in England at the moment which is very unusual for this time of year ....but I still need my desk fan on at work. The others think I'm crazy but basically I fear I may be approaching THAT time !!!!

Christopher said...

I'm pretty much always warm. The only part of me that really ever gets cold is my feet and I have to be out in the cold for quite a while before that happens.

Laura Eno said...

80 is a perfect temperature for me. I came here by way of Alan Davidson's blog. Nice to *meet* you!

Dreamfarm Girl said...

used to always be cold
but now i am old
and i'm always hot
then cold
then hot
then cold...

thus, layers!

Full-On-Forward said...

LOL!!!!! OK--Here's a worserest one....

What do you call a Prostitute getting out of bed?

A Horizon!

OMG--I'm sooo Funny!


Love ya Mean it!


Missed Periods said...

Cute boots!

Adele said...

In school there are usually two options: you feel like you're either in a freezer or in an oven. Seriously. And outdoors it's just freezing. And we have a storm that has a NAME, which is something I haven't seen in Estonia before :O

Jerry said...

What? Why are you trying to convince us that your hit! I know that. Why do you think I'm here? Silly lady.

Uh oh -- gotta' go. Marilyn's coming.

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