Wednesday, December 9, 2009

My World, My Day

Today is Wednesday. Da boys had no school today. It was cancelled due to snow, sleet, freezing rain and hail. I do believe the word “treacherous” was bandished about several times by The National Weather Service. We had a crawling red ticker across the screen…that’s never a good sign.

I awoke at 5:30am and checked my email. There it was…an email from Cancellations.com:

Go back to bed. There will be no learning today. It’s feakin’ treacherous out there. Sweet dreams. Love, your local school district.

I slept till 9am! Then, we lost power. Did I mention we had gale-force winds? That our paltry 37 degrees had a REALFEEL temperature of 28, once you factored in the WIND CHILL?

I HATE having a WINDCHILL. WIND + CHILL = Unhappy, whiny Kathryn.

The temperature in the house immediately dropped by ten degrees, due to the hurricane-force winds taking place outside my humble abode. We closed all the blinds and curtains to retain what little heat was left.

Hence, this is what it looked like:

It was DARK. It was COLD. There was NO teevee. There was NO internet. There was NO telephone.

There was just that freakin’ wind:

“WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”

Five minutes later, da boys are bored. Taylor (17) goes back to bed. Connor(12) and I play 18,000 hands of “WAR”. (Card game) Connor announces, “I’m bored. This snow day sucks.”

“Go play outside. Finish that snowman you started a week ago that looks like a white ant hill in the middle of the front lawn,” says Clinton Kelly, my ever-pragmatic, yet sometimes-sarcastic IV.

“Go work on that snowman,” I say…leaving out the “ant hill” reference. “Here’s a carrot.” “You’ll have no trouble finding downed tree branches for the arms,” I add.

Connor’s eyes light up. Five minutes later, I hear the *SLAM!* as the front door closes. An hour later, I hear a *THUMP!* *THUMP!* as snowballs hit my office window. The power is still out…I am listlessly filing endless pieces of paper.

I look outside:

I smile. The snowmen are facing the house…not the street…they are just for US. We name them Bubba and Eugene, respectively.

Taylor shovels the driveway. I can see the snow is wet…almost slushy. I have no desire to experience it first-hand. This is close enough.

5 hours later, the power is still out. I’m starting to panic, I prepare to say my final goodbye to Clinton:

Me: “I’m done. It’s freakin’ freezing in here. The power’s never coming back on. We’re all gonna die…the pipes’ll freeze…even the dog’s cold. I love you…we could’ve had a long and lovely bloglife together. Damn the WINDCHILL.”

CK: “You’re not dying…you’re just cold. DO NOT press #1 on that call to the electric company. This is NOT considered a life-threatening emergency. You’re gonna get yourself in deep ca-ca. C’mon…put on your iPod…find the B-52’s…let’s dance to Love Shack. Warm you right up.”

And so, we boogie.

At 4pm, the power comes back on. I shout for joy!

HALLELUJAH!

Da boys are starving. I make spaghetti and meat-a-balls. They inhale it. I prepare Metro’s evening doggie-meal. It is 5pm.

The power goes out again. It looks like this:

Kathryn: “NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AREYOUFREAKIN’KIDDINGME? YOU’VEGOTTOBEFREAKIN’KIDDINGME! THISISNOTHAPPENING! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!”

CK: “Crap! Crap! Dammit! Enough! Seriously?!”

Kathryn stumbles down the hall….arms flailing in front of her like a zombie in a bad horror movie…heading for the last known position of the one flashlight with working batteries.

Outside, thunder rumbles…lightening flashes and the skies dump torrential rain.

Precisely 152 minutes later, power is once again resumed. All residents scatter…we’ve had enough of each other to last for the remainder of the day. The phone begins to ring, as people inquire, “Where were you? Why would you be out on such a Godforsaken day??”

I hear Clinton chuckle. If they only knew…


carissajaded said...

I usually don't literally LOL. I hate even using that term. But I did at the fact that your snowmen are facing your home. That is just awesome. And I did so again at the black picture. At first I thought it was an accident. I'm quick like that!

And I'm a little jealous that you had a snow day. I only get one... maybe 1 day every two years, and it's usually half a day for a tiny bit of ice on the road. Buttt that's Texas for ya!

WannabeVirginia W. said...

Snow Day? I live in Canada the land of snow, maple leaf and hockey and we have no snow, where I live, in a valley - lots of maple leaf and hockey every Saturday night!

Great posts, I love the black pictures and the snowperson(s) (yeah the politically correct term so they say!)

Thanks for the giggle.

Heather said...

I LOLed at the first black screen and never stopped!

Sorry you had such a close call to death. Clinton is a strong man!

I miss seeing snowmen, not making them just seeing them. We have had no snow yet, but tonight supposed to get down to 29 here in south Texas.
Brrr..plz send Clinton to keep me from certain death! LOL

Jenny said...

OMG, the black cracked me up! I can absolutely relate to the dark. I grew up in hurricane country down south so power outages were a regular occurrence. I loved them because it meant we got McDonald's for dinner. :)

Love the snowmen! He did a great job. :)

Gillian said...

I just LOVE Bubba and Eugene! Wish I could've helped to make them. I miss the snow.

Joyce said...

Hey, Kathryn ... I must not be awake yet cuz I kept checkikng my computer to see why the "photo" didn't show up til I realized the black was intentional - very very funny, girl. You are too much. Well, as you know I don't live very far from you and while you were enduring the storm, after our morning rain, the sun came out and it was actually balmy all day on sunny Long Island. So next time, pack your bags, and come visit!!!
You can even bring your snowmen. Joyce

book*addict said...

I can just imagine this post as a movie. Everything starts off in color and is wonderful and dandy with that first e-mail. Then the film steadily gets darker and shows the snowmen in a very creepy way. When the lights come back it seems joyous but there's a dark and ominous underscore. and then?
Then the film turns into black and white and focuses on Kathryn (that's you) zombie-ing out of the house and attacking the other neighbors. Oh wait that wasn't in your post.
Well, you get the idea. Yay! there was no school. BOO! the lights were out all day.

Tinkerschnitzel said...

That sucks. All the blackouts we've ever had seem to be in the middle of summer when the AC is desperately needed, i.e. when I was 2 weeks from giving birth to my first child in late May - no power for 3 days due to a tornado, 95 out and 80% humidity. Still, I'd prefer the heat over the cold.

Loredana said...

I'm liking book*addict's idea of this having been like a movie. Sucks when good news turns into THIS! Glad you got the power back though.

Picture Imperfect said...

Oh CRAP! I hate it when the power goes out! It happens *ALL* the time here. We use hydroelectric power and we're way under-supplied. It gets brutal - sometimes 3-4 times a week!!!

I hate wind too. I can handle cold - even extreme cold - but wind makes me irritable and unreasonably crankypants!

Today is a new day... oooohhhhmmmmmm..... lol

~Smoog

Ron said...

Ok...first of all, I'm LOVIN' Bubba and Eugene. How freakin' cute are they????

OMG...I can't believe you had TWO power outs!?!? One of my other blogger friends who lives in Jersey posted the same thing yesterday! Even me (who LOVES to be cold) would have challenges without house heat - Brrrrrrrr!

Ok, and can I just tell how much I LOVE the card game WAR? It's actually the only card game I know how to play - other than FISH!

HAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHA!

Anyway, my friend...hope your power remains ON for the rest of the winter.

"May the force be with you."

xo

Gingerella said...

I had TWO snow days in a row *neener neener neener*. We had a foot of snow dumped on us. No snowmans though. ;)

Boy, you want to talk about power being out, 3 years ago we had a major ice storm that knocked out power over almost the entire county for 3 days; hotels that had heat via generators were packed to capacity and people were lining up to sleep at the Salvation Army because they had no heat at their houses. My husband and I and our pets virtually lived in our kitchen for 3 days, using our gas stove/oven as our only heat source and candles and oil lamps for light. To top it off it stayed a consistent 4 degrees outside the whole time. We were able to keep the kitchen between 55-60 degrees using the oven (which I learned after the fact that ovens shouldn't be used in that capacity due to potential carbon monoxide poisoning, heh) so we didn't freeze to death but damn it was cold! We had probably 4 layers of clothing on plus hats and boots. That's an experience I'll never forget, that's for sure!

filmgirl said...

awwww, I miss those days...in nyc, all we get is RAIN. RAIN RAIN RAIN. I remember as a kid when our power went out my parents build a fire in the fireplace and we were all forced to hang out together and it was AWESOME....this post makes me want to go home and get under a warm blanket and drink hot chocolate.

Maureen@IslandRoar said...

I hate blackouts in the winter. It gets cold in the house sooo quickly. I think you handled it very well. I'm sorry you had to deal with such trauma...

Alicia said...

I had a bit of frost on my car the last two days and I had to scrape like half a millileter or is it minimeter? off my windshield and I was ready to call it a day and go back inside and back to bed. Now I realize how good my life really is.

On the bright side...love the snowmen and love that he put a big smile on their faces whereas I would have put a big pout!

And...I'm so glad Clinton stuck around for all of it. He's such a hero!

Glad you're all ok, hope you don't lose power anymore.

Gavin said...

Still at 599, huh? XD Sorry that was random...I just happened to notice.

It's pretty windy here too...but the electric stayed on. Flickered a bit...but stayed on. XD It's still windy and cold and I don't like it. XD

Cats~Goats~Quotes said...

Great post! I can relate to Kathryn stumbling, arms flailing around. LOL Such a helpless feeling!
Hope you keep power the rest of the winter, but if you don't please post about it!

talk before sleep said...

I won't brag but living in Phoenix I'm sure most of my native friends don't even know what a snow day is. On the flip side, we never got heat days when the temp gets to 122 in the middle of summer and our legs would stick to the plastic seats on the school bus. There is only so much you can take off without being arrested for public indecency. I'm not sure whats worse though....

Sorry you had a blistery day. Getting out of school is supposed to be a enjoyable thing. :( I wish they'd declare it a snow day when the weather is not so bad...kinda like a mental health day rather than a sick day ;)

Kathryn said...

carissajaded: HA! I'm glad I got a laugh out of you! (How hilarious would it have been had Connor made those snowmen facing each other?! I'd never tell him this, but I can just picture it!) I'll trade your Texas warmth for a snow day ANY day.

WannabeVirginiaW: HA! "Snowpersons"! Yikes...maybe we need to re-name them more gender-equal names!

Heather: It was soooooo cold! And yes, the snowmen are adorable. I have instructed Clinton to be on stand-by as your dance partner!

Oddyoddyo13 said...

Man, that sounds like a nightmare!

Kathryn said...

Jenny: Oh, I'm so glad you enjoyed this post...I was sooo relieved to be writing it...in the LIGHT! I'll pass on kudos to Connor for the "men".

Gillian: Thanks! Connor did an excellent job! Ah...missing the snow:the newness wears off fast, doll. Then it's cold...and wet....and freezing...and NOT SO PRETTY.

Joyce: Hey, Secret-Agent! HA! You're not the first to be temporarily stumped by my "blackness photo"! I can't believe you had decent weather...we had crappiness ALL FREAKIN' DAY! Unbeliveable. We'll bring Eugene & Bubba...let's just hope they don't poop in the car.

Gropius said...

Maybe this sounds nuts, but we would LOVE, I repeat LOVE, a day like this. And people in hell want ice water. Yes, we live in SW Florida.

MeanDonnaJean said...

Them power blackouts are a Bitch with a capital "B" when ya got kids in the house. It's hard freakin' enuff to deal with when yer home alone but when ya got whiney-ass kids constantly hammerin' at ya with crap like "I'm bored"; "there's nuthin' to do"; "whens the power comin' back on?" blah blah blah, well, it sure ain't fun. Now just watch....I'll betcha the same damn kinda shit is gonna hit ME tomorrow! That's MY luck.

serendipitous said...

We've been getting hit with some snow. The next town over lost power all evening last night. Luckily, I am still cozy, warm and surfin' the net. :)

Kathryn said...

book*addict: Okay...I seriously howled at this comment! You are too funny, girl! I can see it now: Kathryn-Zombie attacks neighbors (and subsequent alpacas)...film at 11!

Tinkerschnitzel: Yeah, you don't feel like you could DIE from the heat. (Altho, I've been known to whine just as loud) I always say that winter can KILL you.

Loredana: HA! I know....we lost 80% of a perfectly good snow day. BUT, we got Bubba & Eugene out of it.

SMOOG: Oh, yeah! Now, I'm appreciating the simplicity of electricity......ohmmmmmmmmmm.....!

Picture Imperfect said...

ARG! Our power went out today... it's contagious!

Kathryn said...

RON! I know! Bubba & Eugene ROCK! Really? You know the card game WAR? Connor JUST taught me yesterday! Then, we taught Taylor during the SECOND outage...he was *SLAPPING* the card down on the table...he's mutter "CRAP!" if he lost and "YAY!" if he won. It was hilarious!! The house got down to 46 degrees, Ronny!
I was f-f-f-f-freezing!!

Gingerella: That's an unbelievable story! Did you have to sleep in the kitchen as well?? Hey, I'd risk the carbon monoxide poisoning to freezing to death!!

filmgirl: Aw! Yeah, warm blanket and hot cocoa sound awesome! Unfortunately, you really need power for both of 'em! You'll see the snow eventually, sweetie...and for 5 minutes, it'll be CLEAN!

Kathryn said...

Maureen@IslandRoar: (Sniff, sniff) Thank you...it was very traumatic and I'm still in recovery-mode. It may take me several weeks to not be so 'scared of the dark....

Alicia: Thanks for the well-wishes! So far, we've been blackout free for 24 hours! WOOHOO. I'm *almost* caught up on my backed-up computer work!

Gavin: UH-HUH. (I'd like to say I HAVEN'T noticed the 599, but...how could I NOT? And WHY does it bother me so much?? That elusive 6-0-0) Our temps are gonna plummet tomorrow...oh-freakin-joy.

Cats~Goats~Quotes: HA! Thank you! God...I HATE that blind-man-walking feeling! I NEVER expected the power to go out TWICE.

Tom Bailey said...

Playing war was very fun for me as a kid. Then it turned into fun playing blackjack. Then it turned into fun counting cards. Now it is playing bridge with old rich people after charity events.

Funny all that came from your war comment.

Thanks for sharing.

Kathryn said...

talk before sleep: I LOVE the idea of a Mental Health Day. I declare that we shud have one of those a MONTH! (too much??) I don't know what's worse, either. 122 degrees sounds awfully HOT.

Oddyoddyo13: Well, it was C-O-L-D.!

Gropius: Uh-huh. I believe it's called "wanting what you can't have"? I'll trade you one week in SW Florida...oh, pulease!

MeanDonnaJean: AW! I HOPE you don't get hit with it! You're right, of course....the kids don't know WHAT TO DO with themselves during an outage. Hell, *I* didn't know what to do!!

serendipitous: Well, lucky YOU! Thankfully, I've been blackout-free for the whole freakin' day!!

SMOOG! OH, NOOOOOOO! Do the boogie-dance....HURRY!

Allegria said...

True story. First day home with baby. In c-section post surgical pain. I'm upstairs with baby. Alone. Husband and m-i-l are downstairs with company that had been invited to dinner (a month before--baby came early). Power goes out. I'm stumbling around in the dark looking for candles or something to see to nurse baby by. Did anyone come up to offer dinner, a flashlight, company? Noooo. They were all downstairs laughing, joking about no light, having a marvelous time.

Years later, still married to the same guy, I'm happy to report that he has been through the Wife's Sensitivity Training Program and was brilliant enough to pass.

Now if I could just get him to pick up his socks...

Are you still walking in the light this evening? It's sure windy here. Your post cracked me up. I know I'm repeating others, but the dark photos were brilliant. The exposure and focus showed a remarkable aptitude for the fine art of photography. teehee

Kathryn said...

Tom Bailey: Well, you'll be happy to know it's moved on to a new generation. Connor (12) had just learned it from a friend...and taught it to Taylor & I. Fun!

Allegria: I KNEW you could appreciate the time and attention that went into taking photos with such clarity...(they've been unappreciated by SO MANY (dramatically) and it took me so long to get it juuuust riiiight.) I can't believe no-one thought to check on you! And you prob didn't wanna yell or you'd startle the baby. Hubby may have passed course, but he's failed to erase that memory for you...I think it's permanently on your hard drive!

paul wynn said...

Love the fact that you guys still made the best of the treacherous snow day. Snowman picture was priceless! So the kids would rather go to school then stay home bored =)?

Isabella said...

"The snowmen are facing the house…not the street…they are just for US. We name them Bubba and Eugene, respectively."

I love this. It is so sweet.

Kathryn said...

paul wynn: YES! Connor said he'd rather have a blackout at home on a regular school day. SO SPOILED are my kids....!

Isabella: Aw. Thank you! I'm proud of Connor for wanting US to simply appreciate his work, instead of pointing 'em towards the street.

~:C:~ said...

I don't suppose this would be a good time to mention that over here it's a flawless 77? *evil chuckling*

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