Tuesday, October 20, 2009

Jibe Versus Bribe

I’m often reminded of the snowball effect that exists in my somewhat unique (ahem...) thought process. The fact that I’ve just used the dreaded “s” word should remind all who are near and dear to me that future winter-whining is merely a breath away.

Brace yourself, Ron....you ain't heard nothin' yet.

As I typed this last evening, it went something like this:

  1. "I’m cold. Why is it so freakin’ cold in here? It wasn’t this cold before. I think I’ve lost all feeling in my toes.”

  2. “Hmmm. If I’m cold, I should build a fire. Fires are yummy.”

  3. "Oh, wait. I still need to work out, since I’ve finally regained my ability to sneeze without subsequently dropping to my knees in a vain attempt to keep from passing out from the pain resonating from my overstretched and overworked abs.”

  4. “Didn’t I just work out yesterday? ‘Cause I know you’re not supposed to work out every day…heaven forbid we wouldn't want any flabby muscles to retain a memory of being anything other than…well, flabby.”

  5. “Crap. I definitely did not work out yesterday.”

  6. “I can’t believe how cold it is in here! Okay….if I work out, I’ll warm up and regain the sensation in my toes…that’s right. I knew I had a point.”

  7. “Where’s my seltzer? WAIT. It’s almost 5-o’clock! Do I have any Cloudy in the fridge?”

  8. “I probably should not drink until after I work out…I strongly suspect that trainer Debbie-What’s-Her-Name would not condone drinking before or during her workout.”

  9. "You know, I seriously do not appreciate the fact that she jumps up during almost every single group of reps to ‘check form’…what is that about?? I’m beginning to suspect that maybe trainer-Debbie may have gorged on several fun-sized Baby Ruth bars she found stashed in the bottom of her gym bag, hidden underneath the half-empty bottle of mineral water spray and the dog-eared Reader’s Digest from February….making her a little less enthusiastic about cranking out 20 minutes of ab work and 20 minutes of upper body sculpting.”

  10. “Oh, wait. That would be me.”

  11. “Dammit! I KNEW I shouldn’t have bought that bag of candy. WHY didn’t I buy a bag of something I DON’T like? Like Skittles? Or Dum-Dums? I’ve never had a Dum-Dum calling to me in the middle of the day…”(insert obvious joke here…I’ve had two come to mind almost immediately..one clean, one not-so-much.)

  12. “C’mon, Kathryn! Just DO the stupid workout. After that, you can have that Cloudy that’s calling your name. Besides…do you want to look good when you slip into your skinny jeans, or do you wanna look GREAT?”

  13. “Brrrrrr. Why is it so freakin’ cold in here?!?”

So. Here's the unsurprising question of the day: Would you rather be hot...or cold? We're talking body temperature here, people. Wait. Let me re-phrase: Would you prefer a climate that is sizzling...or arctic? (And none of that spring/autumn in-da-middle crap, either. Take a stand, people!)

Let 'em fly!

Áine said...

Thanks for the great post as always Kathryn!
Me? I prefer the sizzling heat! Definately. Where I live,the climate,is somewhat...mixed.
Mostly rainy though. I love holidays (most people do lol) and the main reason is the HEAT.
Gran Canaria is absolutely gorgeous in January.
The Costa Del Sol in August is slightly crowded but the heat is fab! I'd recommend either as brilliant holiday destinations.

BlackLOG said...

I'm a hot runner, which means that I can get a sweat on just thinking about moving. I've tried thinking of ICE when ever I dance or exercise, but being male that sort of multi tasking is way beyond me...

I am popular in bed during the winter months, when Mrs B's Ice cold toes seek me out. Even threats of never giving her a divorce seem to work...

I wish I had a photo (before the beast days, so no snide comments Cathryn) of when I climbed Scafell Pike (The tallest mountain in the England which would register as a pimple in the US) in winter a few years back. When I opened my jacket at the top it looked like a kettle had gone off...

Natalie said...

I prefer hot weather. Obviously, I am living in the wrong area of the nation for that, but I do. :) Each year I look forward to the NY summer that is never long enough.... or like this year, practically non-existent.

And with your random thoughts that you posted... I actually had a craving for wine while I was working out the other night and needed to subside that until after the workout. I did contemplate sipping while working out though!

Lauren said...

I like winter! I typically hide indoors during the summer. My thought process: There are only so many layers you can take off before being arrested. In winter you can keep piling them on.

Runnergirl said...

Although your thought process is different, it's nice to see I'm not the only person who has an internal discussion about whether or not to go to the gym.... I like the idea of drinking before a workout!!! Might make it more enjoyable?

Unknown said...

SIzzle. I'd rather sweat than shiver. Which is good, because in the South, winter lasts about 2 months and it almost never snows. About every 5 years, we get a nice sprinkling of 2-4 inches right before spring, and life just stops. None of us can really drive that well on the snow-covered (haha) roads, and so school's out and businesses close. The other ten or so months of the year, it's sweltering and we run our airconditioners! I love it! Can't imagine living someplace that actually got cold.

Jen T said...

You don't like Skittles??? But...but they're so delicious!

Haha, also love the skinny jeans line:)

Micsteel said...

I really don't mind Winter, Spring, Summer or Fall (all of which have their advantages). I just don't want them all in one day, which has been known to happen here in L.A. - Lower Alabama!

Maureen@IslandRoar said...

That is a hard question. I hate being cold, but as long as I could be indoors, have wool and slippers and a fire, I'd probably choose that over extreme heat. Tough heat just is so draining and gives me migraines. I'm old and boring that way.

Erin@TheLocalsLoveIt said...

I'd much rather be cold. It's easier to warm up for me than cool down. Plus there is something delectable about slippers and a robe.

KT said...

I love the heat. I actually suffered quite a bit moving here (Miami, FL) in 06, because the houses have AC. In nica there is no centralized AC and sometimes the fan wouldn't work. I LOVED sitting on the couch watching TV sweating, and then a huge gust of wind sweeps into the house and cools me off.
HOWEVER, I love winter clothes. the sweaters, the boots, the jackets, and OMG the scarves.

Krissi said...

"Am I in Hell Hot!" :)

Unknown said...

Definitely FREEZE - I love warm clothing, the fabulous coats, soft sweaters, luxurious scarves, smokin' italian boots. I love winter! Besides it also leaves a lot of room for snuggling :) with a warm body...

carissajaded said...

Girl- I always want dum dums.. the candy...

To answer your question, I would much much much a million times over rather be hot than cold. Which is probably a good thing since I live where it is "cold" about 1 month out of the year.

Geeta said...

I am, and probably always have been a bunch of contradictions... I love love love snow (snowflakes, snowmen, snowball fights, snow forts) and wintertime (I got that Holiday feelin'...). BUT! I also love love love LOVE India... so I'm going to have to go with cold weather (blankets and cuddling, yay!) but make it fit in with my love for India by mentioning that many of my friends over there have taken to air-conditioning.... air-conditioned room to car to movie theatre/restaurant/club etc... so I can still get blankets and cuddling yay!

P.S I do the same mental discussion about running... seriously, sometimes it's out loud "Okay, look, you know you always feel better after a run... so just do it!" :)

JD at I Do Things said...


"Where's my seltzer?"

Yeah, I think you need something a little stronger than seltzer, m'dear.

Prepare to hate: I actually like working out. I prefer it to trying to resist fun-size candy bars, anyway.

And I much MUCH prefer being cold. When I'm hot, I get nothing done. I lie there like a hot, limp noodle, eating melted candy bars. But when I'm cold, I feel sharper and and smarter and FASTER.


Unknown said...

Good morning Kathryn!

And yet another great post! You always keep me riveted; LOVE your blog my friend!

Ok so to the question. It happens that I live in a rather frigid part of the world and I like it not too bad. It's not cold ALL year - just most of it. LOL! I like a cooler climate because I can bundle up and still be warm enough to be out and about at most temps.

However... if I am ever so lucky to not need to work or grocery shop or... leave the beach? I want to go sizzling hot so I can live in my bikini (or even better yet - NOTHING! lol) and not overheat. And I can have staff... someone to keep the SPF flowing, someone to bring the mojitos... someone to create a breeze with a palm frond.

Ok... the *hot flash* is definitely winning out over here! :)

Have an awesome day!

Spot said...

COLD!!! Seriously, my dream is to move to Alaska. And raise snow dogs. Or write. And it's best when we are snowed in and nobody can get in or out! That has only happened once in the last 8 years but it was heaven. The snow was a foot deep and I made my children hike a mile down to the frozen lake and back (omg...they whined and so did my hubby but I was in heaven) and then we built a huge roaring fire and I read them "To Build a Fire" by Jack London. And they got it, because they had just been freezing. It was an awesome day!!

And cold is better because you can build a fire, put on more clothes, drink something hot, snuggle tons of things to get warmer. Once you've stripped down to the skin and you're still hot theres not much left.


PS- in the summer I keep the air cranked up so far that people have to put on sweaters in my house! But I make up for it in the winter by not setting the heat very high.

Tinkerschnitzel said...

I think I prefer the summer, although it gets way too hot June-August. It freezes January-March, and makes my knees hurt so bad I can barely move. I would prefer the summer more if it didn't get quite so hot. This year was not quite so bad. :)

kathryn said...

Smileyfreak: Oh...! I SO want to be where you are! Is sounds like heaven to me. Feel free to come and get me at any time...I'm so there....

BlackLOG: Okay...three words...listen carefully: "Stop Running. Outside." There. Now, you can get an industrial-sized air conditioning unit (just use the green you were gonna use for the 68" flat-screen) and you'll be cool as a cuke.
So, you're announcing (with much glee, I might add) that you "climbed a pimple, reached the summit, opened your jacket and steam arose." Were you cookin' potatoes in there??

serendipitous: HA! I'm with you...on all counts! Winters are def too short here...I do believe we are in the wrong part of the country for our preferences. As for the wine/working out...damn...I wish they'd work a way around this. It's SO HARD to pick one or the other!

Lauren: Okay. The threat of incarceration is not a good enough reason to like winter better! What about flippies? And seeing your toes in a shade other than blue??

Runnergirl: I've GOT IT! They need to develop a cocktail that will make the workout more bearable (that's the buzz), but give you ENERGY for the workout at the same time! We'll call it: BUZZBULL! Think how chatty & happy we'd all be at the gym...we'd socialize and smile....it's freakin' genius!

jmberrygirl: Again...it sounds perfect to me...and it sounds like you totally love it there! I'm so happy for you...to live where you truly love!

livelove'n'wine: No, I don't like skittles! I do believe they're masquerading around as M&m's, which I like. Then, I'm upset when I realize there's no chocolate inside. It's fraud, I tell ya!
(PS: Love my skinny jeans!)

Mike Steelman: What? All 4 seasons in 1 day? How is that even possible? I'll bet for the most part, it's beautifully balmy there...not extremes, which is what we NY-kers seem to get.

Maureen@IslandRoar: But...but. You have to go OUTSIDE...sometime! Would you rather be sitting on the icy-cold bleachers watching the game or sipping iced tea and getting a tan? Hmmmmm?

Erin@TheLocalsLoveIt: Sigh. People, people, people. I'll buy you a robe & slippers...and I'll turn the A/C on HIGH. We can work it OUT!

book*addict: Yeah, well...fashion aside....altho, I hear you. If we could do 6 weeks of winter (just for the sake of the cute clothes, etc) I'd do it. Then, it's straight back to SUMMER.

Krissi: I think she likes it HOT! YEAH! Bring it on, baybee!!

WannabeVirginiaW.: Okay, I agree with the snuggling. It's no fun to cuddle when you're all sticky...but that's IT. How about all that weight getting in and out of the car? Too hot in the car, too cold outside?

carissajaded: YAY. You may have the entire bag of dum-dums, my dear. I will even personally deliver them...and then may move next door. Your weather sounds perfect to me!

Geeta: Yeah. Snow=holidays...I get that. So, I still feel one month of winter shud be enough. Of course, I'm preaching to the choir here....!

Ron said...

Hola my Wild and Crazy Friend!

Ok...well, you KNOW what my answer is, don't you?

Cold of course!

I think in a pastlife I was a penquin who lived in Anarctica because I love it VERY cold. The kind of cold that feels as though it's going to RIP the skin off your face - honest!

Now, that being said...how is it that I lived in Flordia for 20 years?

I'll tell ya....I WHINED my ass off!


So, you go right ahead and whine, my friend. Because I'll be doing the same thing in July.

Love ya!

Great post!!!!

And have a warm and cozy day.


P.S. red wine goes very well with cold - trust me, I know.

Kelly@MentalGarbage said...

Cold for sure. You can always layer up or grab a blanket... When it's hot, there is nothing you can do except be hot and sticky and stinky and gross.... I hate summer. hahaha

Michelle Stiles said...

Living in the Pacfic Northwest, cold her is a wet cold. It is the kind of cold where those puffy down jackets arn't going to keep you warn because they are going to be a wet soppy mess. My hair will never dry on its own during the winter months. Wet cold is the worst!
I would much rather be too hot!!!

Anonymous said...

I like a bit of both actually. xD But if I had pick one or the other, I'd go for cold. It's easier for me to warm up then cool down. Lovely post. They always make me chuckle.

kathryn said...

JD at I Do Things: NOOOOOOO! This cannot be! We cannot be THIS incompatible! How will we settle in Boca with our arthritis and bladder control issues and scream at each other over the TV? You'll wanna do jumping jacks in the cold and I'll want to eat candy by the pool. Crap.

Smoog! What a fabulous post, my friend! (Of course, all those compliments definitely got you off on the right foot!) I like your reasoning behind staying bundled against the cold, but I looove your wonderful description of the beach...with the cabana boys fanning us with palm fronds...beats the hell out of those "natural" tradewinds.....
(You DID mention cabana boys...didn't you?)...where was I?

Spot! "It has just been freezing. It had been an awesome day!!" I know it took this out of context, but I cudn't resist! Okay, so having a roaring fire IS nice....but then I have to be parked directly in front of it. SO, that means no cooking or cleaning from Nov thru March.

Alicia said...

I'd rather freeze than sizzle any day. I mean if your cold you can cuddle up under a blankie and sip warm tea and read or watch a movie. But when you're hot, your sweaty, sticky, icky and disgusting. I mean I know that girls only glisten we don't sweat, but inside I feel like outside I'm all of the above! I love winter, I even love the fog, good thing cause we live in the heart of it!

Nice post!

kathryn said...

Tinkerschnitzel: I think it's the extremes that make it difficult. It would be nice if it could just stay...June....for the whole 12 months.

Ron! Are you kidding me? You like it when it's so cold you face feels like it's gonna break? THAT kinda cold?? Do you run HOT, Ron? Seriously...are you one of those ppl that everyone snuggles up to in the winter 'cause they just emanate the heat?? I cannot imagine how you survived Fla all those years...you must've HATED it. Well, thank you for giving me your blessing on the whining...not that it would have stopped me, anyway. (Is it too late for an Indian Summer??) xoxo

KellyGrrl: Ah. A summer-hater. You may change your tune, missy after you hear the "whine heard 'round the world". And you wudn't be stickly if you were lounging on a float on some shoreline of the Bahamas...now, would you?

Michelle Stiles: YES! That raw kinda cold sucks, doesn't it? I feel like it goes right into my BONES and then I can't chase the chill. I'll meet you on that beach in the Bahamas...you bring the sunscreen!

Insanity! Thanks, sweetie. I just wish there was more of an in-between...and I'm sure there is, just not here in NY. We seem to love our extremes...too much rain, cold, humidity, bugs.
'Course, it can't be ME that's the problem, right???

Oddyoddyo13 said...

Okay....I guess you could say I prefer being warm. Sometimes I shut the door in my room, open the window, and turn off the fan just so I'll roast.
But then again, living in Arizona, I want it to be cold most of the time. (You know, if you live somewhere cold you want it warm and if you live somewhere hot you want it to be cold.) I'm no different and prefer rain to sunshine but cold isn't exactly my favorite climate when it actually does get cold. But I'm sure if I ever live somewhere cold, I'll adjust perfectly.

Jen said...

Sorry I've been AWOL for a while. Took a little break from the blogosphere for the week. Thanks for the Twitter.
I think you know the answer to my question. I keep saying that I need to live in the tropics during the winter. When it's below 70 degrees I manage to get goose bumps. And, my skin is just miserable with no humidity. Minnesota is not a good place for me several months out of the year. But, it's home. Already planning the winter vacation.

Unknown said...

Well, if you are going to make me choose, I would have to say I prefer COLD when I'm inside staying warm and HOT when I'm inside staying cool. :)

Sorry but I'm definitely one of those "spring/autumn in-da-middle crap" kind of people.

Thanks for another great post!

Heather said...

Sorry I am so late...I perfer the winter. We don't get to see it for long down here in south Texas. The heat is just so miserable, sometimes it gets hard to breathe. Bring on the cold!

Tia said...

I definitely prefer the arctic cold. I figure I can keep putting on layers but there's only so much I can take off when its too freaking hot. Of course that could be because I have hot flashes even when others are freezing their patooties off. hmmmm.

My kid & I just went camping this past weekend and it got down to 33 degrees. That's how much I love the cold weather. I just snuggled into my sleeping bag & fell asleep to the sound of the coyotes. :)

Moonrayvenne said...

I Have to agree with Jen, when it gets below 70, I am cold. So, I definitely prefer HOT, HOT, HOT! Michigan is not the place for me, but until I hit the big lottery, I suppose I am stuck with that damn four-letter word that will be here way too soon for me! But it's going to be almost 70 today, for one last time this year...boohoo!

kathryn said...

Oddyoddyo13:Sorry...I cud've sworn I'd commented on this yesterday...too many windows open on my 'puter, I'm thinking. But it's dry in AZ, right? Not that sticky heat? LOVE your avatar, BTW.

Hey Jen! It's okay, sweetie. Yes, I am your soulmate in all things related to the cold season. We need to drag our sorry butts to The Bahamas...and make Ron come with us!

Kimberly: Thank you!Yeah...I hear you...it's the extremes that do us in. "Middle of the road" is really NOT such a bad way to be...at least, weather-wise!

Heather: Well, I can appreciate that...you don't get enough of a break from the cold, right? We see too much of it up here...winter (serious 40-degrees and lower) starts in Nov (earlier this year!) and goes thru March...that's a long season, I think!

Tia: Wow...you can actually fall asleep to the sound of coyotes?? I'd be running for the hatchback! You are a braver woman than I...but we knew that already.

Collette: So, instead of the "boohoo" for the 70-degree day, make it a WOOHOO day. Ya never know...we could still have an Indian Summer...couldn't we?? (Or..gee...there's jumping on a plane...yeah!!!)

Unknown said...

You betcha cabana boys! And since in my fantasy we can have cabana girls too. LOL!

I don't really care what their gender is as long as they cater to my every whim and desire!

There... now THAT wasn't so hard was it??? lol

Have a fantastic day kathryn!

Loredana said...

Give me the heat any day. I HATE being cold! HATE IT! Although, I love the winter, so it's a little odd. But I like to sit near a hot, cozy fire in the winter and not freeze my a*s off making snow angels.

miss Yelpington said...

I like the sun but it hates me i get the lot- prickly heat,sunstroke,my skin is so pale i burn within like five minutes.

I'd be much happier too cold than too hot maybe because i don't have much choice (i live in Scotland)but i think if your cold you can put layers on and a fire.
if your too hot theres only so many layers you can take off lol xxx

kathryn said...

Smoog! Cabana "people" for everyone!! (sigh.....)

Loredana: I'm with you. Too cold, too slippery and I kinda like being able to FEEL my toes!

miss cii: True, true. We need a place with temps in the mid-70's and some nice tradewinds.....ahhhhhhh.

Cat said...

I prefer very cold to very hot because the cold doesnt give you cancer, so basically it wins at life. Also, what can you do if you're hot? I'll tell you: nothing. If you're cold there are jumpers and blankets and soup. Yummm

jh said...

You're still working out?!

kathryn said...

Cat: What? Does this mean if I move to Boca, I'm gonna get sick? What about all those indoor germs from ppl in the winter? And the flu?
Although, I like blankets and soup...

JH: HEY. Why do you seem so surprised?

Post a Comment

Fabulous Insights by Fabulous Readers

Note: Only a member of this blog may post a comment.