Tuesday, April 7, 2009

Pick Your Poison

Today, I had a choice to make…between two pretty daunting tasks. I could either finish doing my taxes, or go to the DMV to renew my license.

(Insert dramatic sigh here.)

“Why one or the other?”

Kathryn: “What? Why one….or….what?”

Clinton Kelly, my ever-pragmatic, ever- persnickety IV: “Why didn’t you do both? Just get ‘em over with. ‘Kill two birds with one stone’, if you will.”

K: “Wow. What a horrible expression…and so insensitive of you, given the fact that you know my fondness for our little feathered friends. Not to mention…easy for you to say. When was the last time you did either of these chores?”

C: “I can’t remember. I have people.”

K: “Oh, riiiight. You have people. People to do your taxes.”

C: “Yup.”

K: “And people to spend half a day at the DMV for you.”

C: “Right. That's the thing about having people. I still don’t understand. Why did you wait so long on both of these things? You’ve known for like, nine years that your license would expire on your birthday this year, right?”

K: “Yeah. So. What’s your point? It seemed like every time I thought of it, we’d be at the end of the month, or the beginning of the month…and everyone knows you don’t go anywhere near the DMV then, so I just kept putting it off.”

C: “Isn’t your birthday on Sunday? As in this Sunday?? Easter Sunday?”

K: “Uh huh. That’s why I realized I had to go get it renewed this week. Besides…the 12th is in the middle of the month, so I figured it wouldn’t be so crowded. Smart, right?”

C: “No. Smart would have been taking care of this a few months ago….”

K: (Rolls eyes) “Whatever. It doesn’t matter…the lady says they’re busy all the time. Evidently, there is no slow time at The Department of Motor Vehicles….and no-one there seems to know why. I found this to be quite annoying…and more than a little bit dishonest….I mean, how can there never be a slow time? I think they just wanna keep their quiet time to themselves….whenever it is…”

C: “So, how long were you there?”

K: “Well, I got there at 11:50am and I had ticket# B-223.”

C: (Confused) “I’ve no idea what that means.”

K: “Of course you don’t….you have people. I was there for about an hour and forty-five minutes.”

C: “Yikes.”

K: “Well, it would’ve been shorter if I’d known what forms I needed. You’d think I’d asked her for a burger & fries...by the look on her face. Geez.”

C: “Okay. I can only assume you’re hungry. Can I interest you in a hunk of Jarlsburg?”

K: “That would be nice. Anyway, I did the form, paid the check, posed for the dreaded photo. Made her take it 3 times, in fact. The first time, I looked downright traumatized….I don’t know why.”

C: “Part of the overall experience, no doubt. I’m guessing the second shoot had some hair issues?”

K: (Eyes wide) “That’s right! How did you know?!”

C: “It’s always about the hair, kiddo. Third time’s the charm.”

K: “Well, whatever. They gave me some temporary thing. I’m imagining they mail ‘em so they don’t have to hear us people whine about how much we hate the photo.”

C: “I’m sure it’ll be fine. How bad can it be?”

K: “Yeah….this from the man who probably has his publicity head shot on his license.”

C: (Chuckles) “Okay, Miss-B223. I believe we’re done here.”

K: “Can I still get that burger? I’ve starved all day for my photo shoot…..”

susan F said...

Well, you're right, you had two very unpleasant tasks to contend with. I hate hate hate getting my picture taken. Although it only takes about 5-10 minutes for us to renew our license, because our town is so small.

Kathryn said...

I don't know of anyone who's proud of their license photo, so I don't have high hopes for it...5-10 minutes?! You lucky dog!

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