Monday, September 2, 2013

Implode

I'm assuming you'd like to hear the story of my first trip into my new home state, right?

Any objections?? Speak now....(**crickets**)

Okay good. Here we go:

It was a Tuesday. I flew Virgin America and had an uneventful flight from NY to CA:

In hindsight, that may or may not have been smoke from wildfires...at the time though, all I kept thinking was "oooooh....pretty mountains!" 

When we landed in LA, all I could think was, "Where are the palm trees? Wait, is that--I think I see them!!"

Even though I've been MIA from InsideOut for a while, I'm lucky to still have my celebrity buds standing by to help with the messy disembarking, decompressing, ear-popping and endless claiming of one's bags. And so, I was elated to see my good friend George waiting for me in the terminal:
Yeah, I know....he looks annoyed. That's because he tried to meet me at the gate and therefore had to navigate security...and all they really wanted was his autograph. Whatever. Being famous comes with some inconveniences, right? It's not my fault.


We then had to walk REALLY FAST to the baggage terminal, as if we were being chased by wild boar! I have no idea what that was about but I spent the entire walk chatting at his back about my uneventful flight, my lunch and how airport security had confiscated the hotel-sized grape jam that had mysteriously appeared in my bag.

When we reached the baggage carousel, George immediately sat down, blending into the crowd and started casually flipping through some newspaper. I noticed he'd donned a baseball cap emblazoned with the slogan, "I don't need a recipe. I'm Italian!" on it. This is when I'd realized I was on my own retrieving my bags.

Sigh.

S-l-i-d-e.....CRASH!!!.....round and round they go. I'm waiting patiently at first...people-watching, "Is that Gaga? Nope...just an 8-year-old girl. Is that the guy who played the mean guy on The Office? He had an unusual name...'Snowblower'? 'Hail'? Now I remember...it was 'Rainn-something'? No, wait. That man looks to be in his 80's...never mind."

All of the above took place over an extended period of time and I suddenly realized that there were no bags left to claim. Now, my bag was MIA, as was George
...who'd decided to head for the airport bar to wait out was was sure to be a laborious lost-luggage process.

I dejectedly headed into the Virgin America office, eyes darting to the corners of the room for any sign of my black, overstuffed bag. The woman behind the desk inquired as to my name and upon hearing it, she replied (somewhat snippily), "Yes. He's bringing its contents to you now."

Its contents? As in....the inside of said bag? WTF??

Sure enough, this guy rounds the corner by the baggage carousel and in his hand he is half-carrying, half-dragging a huge, clear plastic bag containing all my stuff. Prominently displayed are my undies, cosmetics and what I realize is an inordinate amount of Q-tips...all jumbled and mish-mashed together....quite the opposite I might add, to the neat, organized packing it took me two days to accomplish. 

I heard a tapping coming from above and glanced up to see George, attempting an Oscar-winning performance in his efforts to not burst into uncontrolled gales of laughter...
and failing miserably. I'll deal with you later, GC.

I turn to the airport guy:

Kathryn: "Seriously? WTH?"

Airport Guy: (Sheepish) "Yeah. I know....go figure."

K: "What the hell happened? It's not Samsonite, ya know. You can't be all throwing it around like it's made of Kryptonite, or something."

A.G.: "That's Superman. Superman has Kryptonite. You're thinking of the monkey who threw the luggage around in those ancient teevee commercials."

K: "I DON'T CARE! What happened to my luggage?"

A.G.: (Sniffs) "It seems to have imploded. No-one knows how or why these things happen...they just do. Kind of a freak of nature....like heat lightning...or those sneakers designed to look like human feet."

K: "So...with no human intervention whatsoever, this piece of perfectly good luggage just...'imploded'...out of the blue, throwing my unmentionables all willy-nilly?"

A.G.: "Uh huh. And an inordinate amount of Q-tips as well, I might add."

K: "Where's the suitcase itself?"

A.G.: "Oh, it's in there. See the bits of black material? I think I got it all."

At this point, I sat on the floor next to my plastic-bag-luggage and wondered how the hell I was going to exit the airport with this thing in tow. This goes waaaay beyond embarrassing...even for me. By this time, the area was virtually deserted and George decided to join me to survey the damages. When we opened the bag, we discovered that miraculously, my black bag was still intact....just inside out. After many tugs and pulls and other sophisticated suitcase maneuvers, we managed to right it and after several tries, we even got the zipper to close after dumping all my crap back into it.

We stood up, released the handle that allowed my bag to roll out the door and as George handed me a coffee cup (actually filled with a vodka tonic, which made all forgiven), he smiled...and said, "Welcome to Cali, Kathryn!"

The next day, I replaced the luggage.

Happy Labor Day, all!

xoxo

Gigi said...

You have no idea how happy I am to find you popping up in my feed!

Moving is stressful, particularly across country!

Happy Labor Day!

kathryn said...

Gigi: Aw. I'm glad that you're happy to see me! It feels SO GOOD to be able to share my thoughts & experiences (from my perspective, of course). Yes, moving is stressful but I feel this will totally be worth it.
Happy Labor Day to you too, sweetie!

J9 said...

Welcome to my home state! Good to see you back to blogging!

Jayne Martin said...

Hysterical! And may I add, yet another reason why I don't fly. Although, for a George sighting...? Welcome to California!

Alicia said...

It's nice to know that the good things in life never change, and you are one of the good things and you haven't changed a bit, still brilliant as always! As GC says, Welcome to Cali! (What the heck took you so long?)

kathryn said...

J9: Thank you! I am unbelievably happy to be here. (Both in Cali and here in Blogville)
Jayne Martin: Thank you, my dear. And yes...flying is far less of a bother when Clooney's around. It's still a pain, though...
Alicia: Ha! You are such a sweetie! I honestly don't know what took me so long...once I realized this is where I wanted to be, it all seemed to make perfect sense. It is sooooo beautiful here, I can't stand it!

Lauren said...

I went to Germany this summer. To get in to Germany, I flashed my passport to a bored looking dude in a booth and was waved through. I collected my suitcase, that was it. To get back into Canada, where I've lived for 24 years, I had to fill out a form, carry that form to a line, put the form in a machine that copied my form, get in another line, present my form and be interrogated by some woman, get in yet another line, collect my one freaking suitcase, get in another line and present that damn form again. After that, I was free! My first order of business, shrug off hugs from my parents in favour of finding a bathroom. I HATE AIRPORTS! At least you had George...

sage said...

You can take an inconvenient mishap and spin a funny story! My first visit to California included a riot (I later picked up a second riot in Berkeley). The story about my LA riot:
http://sagecoveredhills.blogspot.com/2008/01/travel-memories-flying-to-japan-and-la.html#comment-form

Cathy Olliffe-Webster said...

You moved across the country! So did I! Only my stuff didn't travel in a clear plastic garbage bag! Hey, I hear it's the new Samsonite, though.

Happy trails! And pass me a Q-tip.

Angelina said...

A much better story than mine.

A few years ago all luggage on our flight from Sidney, Australia to New Zealand was left in Australia. Of course, they failed to tell us until we had landed. Did they not notice how light the plane was? I can't tell you what a zoo it was with almost 300 people waiting in line to fill out forms some of them more than a bit perturbed. Were was George then with that coffee, I ask?

wendy said...

So glad you found your luggage. I've only flown once in my whole life, but I have to imagine the whole luggage thing could've been way worse. It was so nice of George to stay there with you. He seems wonderful :)

Collette Palmer said...

So glad to have you back in bloggyland! I hope your new home gives you all sorts of things to blog about. Welcome Back!!!

kathryn said...

Lauren: Wow! So, I guess Germany doesn't really give a crap whether you visit them or not...is that the moral? Canada obviously cares SO deeply about you! And yeah....at least I had George....
sage: Oh, boy! I just love me a good riot story! I'll head there as soon as I finish up here....I promise. Good to see you, sage!
Cathy Olliffe-Webster: Ha! Yeah, it's tres chic to travel with clear garbage bags these days...it's so much cooler than using paper grocery bags. Congrats on your move as well!!

kathryn said...

Angelina: Yikes. The airline forgot the entire plane's luggage??! I hope someone got written up for that faux pas. That must've been one quiet baggage carousel....
wendy: Thank you. I can't imagine how horrible it must be to never get your luggage back. I mean, how can you replace the neon-orange Crocs where one of your kids scribbled on one with a black sharpie? Irreplaceable, I tell ya!
Collette Palmer: Thank you, sweetie. I'm trying hard to find my way back...to find that all-elusive balance between what's just for me (Blogville) and the rest of life. Thanks for the sweet comment!

Share Clear Best Cardsahring Cccam Server said...

Splendid Article, there are being reading this web site recent days and nights but now document used your time to thank you for a records youre the one discussing around.

Cccam Server

Mark Price said...

Long Lost blog friend! Love the post and the pics. Have recently re-discovered the blogosphere and realized that I have missed it so much! Congrats on your move and the Clooney sightings. Your E-Mail has changed I guess cause i keep getting my messages back. That sucks cause one was really funny about a nigerian prince and such! Miss you!

bumbu pecel bali said...

this good POST
I like this.

form
http://bantalsilikon01.blogspot.com
http://bumbupecel.esy.es
http://www.facebook.com/bantalsilikongrosir
http://bumbupecelbali.blogspot.com

bumbu pecel bali said...

this is good post...

i like this...

please can you visit here..

http://bantalsilikon01.blogspot.com/
http://bantalkekabumurah.blogspot.com/
http://bantalkekabumurah.blogspot.com/
http://bantalkekabumurah.blogspot.com/
http://bantalsilikon01.blogdetik.com/bantal-silikon-original085-635-945-40/
http://bumbupecel1.blogspot.com/
http://bumbupecel1.blogspot.com/2014/04/bumbu-pecel-enak.html
http://bumbupecel1.blogspot.com/2014/04/kami-menjual-bumbu-pecel-cabe-merah-dan.html

http://marinirseo.blogspot.com/
http://marinirseo.blogspot.com/
http://marinirseo.blogspot.com/


tengs very much...

Ding Dong said...

Agent Betting Online

Agen Bola

Agen Togel

Agen Casino

Agen Tangkas

Agen Poker

Bandar Poker

Judi Poker

Judi Online

Domino Online

Buku Mimpi

Prediksi Toto

Hasil Togel Hari Ini

Rumus Togel

Zona Live Score

Bandar Judi Online

Agen Judi

Agen Judi Online

Judi Online Terpercaya

Togel

Prediksi Togel Jitu

Hasil Togel

Poker Terpercaya

Movie Online

Pinky Sharma said...

Packers and Movers Bangalore

Pinky Sharma said...

Packers and movers @ http://professionalmovers.in/
Packers and Movers Chennai@ http://professionalmovers.in/packers-and-movers-in-chennai/
Packers and Movers Bangalore@ http://professionalmovers.in/packers-and-movers-in-bangalore/

gelo cly said...

Good day! I simply would like to give you a big thumbs up for the excellent information you have here on this post. I am returning to your website for more soon.Arenabetting.org

amine lahragui said...

I appreciate you and hopping for some more informative posts. happy new year 2016 new year 2016 happy new year 2016 images feliz año nuevo 2016 imagenes de año nuevo 2016 feliz año 2016 happy new year images 2016 new year 2016 images new year images 2016 bonne année 2016

Ikana Layana said...

after took time to read the content of this article seems very good and useful material once . cara menggugurkan kandungan

Giyanti Astatik said...

The story of a journey that has cost you to share in this post we can make the experience .
vimax
obat perangsang wanita
obat sipilis

Harish Yes said...

You made some good points there. I searched this topic and found out that most people will agree with your post. packers and movers bangalore packers and movers bangalore marathahalli packers and movers marathahalli packers and movers hsr layout packers and movers btm layout packers and movers bommanahalli packers and movers whitefield packers and movers koramangala packers and movers jp nagar

Sonu Kumar said...

good blog
prem ratan dhan payo torrent, kickass

Ramesh Kumar said...

If you are looking Best Packers and Movers so Visit at :
Packers and Movers in Bangalore
Packers and Movers in Chennai
Packers and Movers in Delhi
Packers and Movers in Gurgaon

Ramesh Kumar said...

Thanks for sharing your info. I really appreciate your efforts and I will be waiting for your further write
Packers and Movers Bangalore
Packers and Movers Hyderabad
Packers and Movers Pune

Dhruv Shah said...


You can send new year pictures to all your friends.
New year pictures
Happy new year pictures 2016

rhed edler atrieda said...

Good day! I could have sworn I’ve visited this website before but after looking at many of the articles I realized it’s new to me. Anyways, I’m definitely happy I stumbled upon it and I’ll be bookmarking it and checking back frequently!
Agen Bola Blog

Karmijan Tardi said...

This article is very useful and add knowledge to the readers . obat penggugur kandungan

jagat said...

happy to be able to visit this blog can add to my knowledge . obat bius

Ankit Das said...

Keep uploading informative posts like it.... Thanks a lot for sharing it with us.....
Happy New Year 2016

New Year Images 2016

Happy New Year Wallpaper 2016

New Year 2016 Images

Happy New Year Wallpaper

Happy New Year eCards

Happy New Year 2016 Messages

Dallas Larden said...

It's good that you found your Luggage safely...I lost once while trip to New York...It was very bad experience!!!

Crazy Bulk

Hanny Vania said...

Mitra303 | Agen Sbobet | Agen Judi | Agen Bola
Agen Judi Online
Agen Judi
Agen Judi Terpercaya
Agen Bola
Bandar Judi
Bandar Bola
Agen SBOBET
Agen Casino
Agen Poker
Agen IBCBET
Agen Asia77
Agen Bola Tangkas
Prediksi Skor

Men said...

Happy Pongal Wishes SMS

Happy Pongal Wishes Recipes

Happy Pongal Wishes Greetings

Happy Pongal Wishes Kolam

Happy Pongal Wishes

aarohi sharma said...



WWE PPV main events were rocking in 2015, hope this year it will rocks again, like all previous years all events were perfect now hope so this year also. It begins with royal rumble, then next WWE Fastlane 2016 live stream will be available on internet.
Fastlane 2016 Results
Fastlane 2016 Live Stream
WWE Fastlane 2016 Live


Really Horror Show American Horror Story, i ever watched, here are some more interesting tv shows like the walking dead, arrow, Breaking Bad, Game of Thrones Season 6 Online we can stream, After watching these tv shows one can feel interested more an excited more.
Game of Thrones Season 6
Game of Thrones Season 6 Online
Watch Game of Thrones Season 6
Watch Game of Thrones Season 6 Online
Game of Thrones Season 6
Game of Thrones Season 6 Online
Watch Game of Thrones Season 6
Watch Game of Thrones Season 6 Online


I watched this event, really very much interesting scenes created while selecting Miss Universe 2015. But here is one more .big event going to held Academy Awards 2016 here is direct link for this event.
Academy Awards 2016 Nominations
Oscar Awards 2016 Nominations
Academy Awards 2016
Oscar Awards 2016
Academy Awards 2016 Live
Oscar Awards 2016 Live
Academy Awards 2016 Live Stream
Oscar Awards 2016 Live Stream
Academy Awards 2016 Winner
Oscar Awards 2016 Winner

All episodes of Torrent The Walking Dead Season 6 series are available here for viewers. These episodes can be watched online in HD Quality Like 1080 PX or 4K.
The Walking Dead Season 6
Walking Dead Season 6
The Walking Dead Season 6 Online
Walking Dead Season 6 Online
Watch The Walking Dead Season 6
Watch Walking Dead Season 6

noman khan said...

I like your theme of choice for web journal however need to recommend you for sharing some more data with respect to your subject so we can comprehend your idea all the more unmistakably... Buzz Application

Youtube To Mp3 said...

This is a great article, that I really enjoyed reading. Thanks for sharing.

usps tracking
weather
facebook video downloader
youtube to mp3

Foram Malik said...

thank u for sharing such a useful information... if u want to promote your business than plzz have a look..

http://hojayga.com/
http://hojayga.com/cities/b2bdatabaseproviderinup.php
http://hojayga.com/cities/b2bdatabaseproviderinlucknow.php
http://hojayga.com/cities/b2bdatabaseproviderinkanpur.php
http://hojayga.com/cities/b2bdatabaseprovideringhaziabad.php
http://hojayga.com/cities/b2bdatabaseproviderinagra.php
http://hojayga.com/cities/b2bdatabaseproviderinmeerut.php
http://hojayga.com/cities/b2bdatabaseproviderinrajasthan.php
http://hojayga.com/cities/b2bdatabaseproviderinjaipur.php
http://hojayga.com/cities/b2bdatabaseproviderinjodhpur.php
http://hojayga.com/cities/b2bdatabaseproviderinajmer.php
http://hojayga.com/cities/b2bdatabaseproviderinudaipur.php
http://hojayga.com/cities/b2bdatabaseproviderinalwar.php

Ankit Das said...

Happy Valentines Day 2016

Valentines Day Images

Happy Valentines Day Images

Rose Day SMS

Rose Day Quotes

Rose Day Wishes

BROCK LESNAR said...

Fastlane 2016
WWE Fastlane 2016
Fastlane 2016 Live Stream
WWE Fastlane 2016 Live Streaming

saurabh rampal said...

propose day images
happy propose day sms 2016
propose day 2016 greetings
kiss day sms wallpaper

kiss day msgs

kiss day photos download


hug day sms in hindi for girlfriend
hug day 2016 sms in english
rose day whatsapp single line status
rose day shayari sms in hindi
7th feb rose day sms
rose day 2016 love sms

valentines day romantic sms

valentines day romantic sms in hindi

happy valentines day 2016 romantic SMS

happy valentine day romantic sms in tamil

happy valentine day romantic sms in Telugu

fastlane live streaming
who won fastlane 2016
wwe fastlane 2016 live stream
fastlane 2016 results
fastlane winner 2016
wwe fastlane live streaming
who won wwe fastlane 2016
fastlane 2016 live stream
fastlane results 2016
fastlane 2016 winner
happy holi 2016 images
happy holi 2016
bhojpuri holi songs
holi songs on radha krishna
radha krishna wallpaper on holi
Rangapanchami SMS in marathi
Hola Mohalla Holi SMS in Punjabi
Holi arti bhajan lyrics download
greeting cards for holi 2016
Download ecards for holi
Holi Gande SMS
Holi Sexy Hindi Adult jokes
Love Holi SMS Greetings
bura na mano holi hai poem

Post a Comment

Fabulous Insights by Fabulous Readers