Thursday, April 7, 2011

Closer Than They Appear

Kathryn: “Dammit! Sonofabitch. Crap, crap, crap. I can’t freakin’ believe it. This bites.”

Connor (Staring at computer monitor): “That’s nice. Hmmmmm….”

Kathryn: “You’re not even listening to me. Pay attention this minute.”

Connor (Eyes still on the screen): “You’re smothering me.”

Kathryn: “What?”

Connor: “Huh?”

Kathryn: “This is serious. I need to vent. Honor thy mother.”

Connor (Heavy sigh…regretfully pulls his gaze away from the computer): “Okay. What happened?”

Kathryn (Falls into a chair, looking miserable): “Well. I’ve been so…freakin’…busy. Like, mad-busy…not normal-busy. Crazy-busy…like, insanely-busy.”

Connor: “So…you’re saying you’ve been busy. Duly noted.” (Turns to go back to computer)

Kathryn: “No! You don’t understand…I missed my three-year Blogiversary…it was on Tuesday! AND my website expired and I still can’t find the email and when I checked it today, it was a site for ‘internal cleansing’ or something…and (jumps out of chair) OHGOD, OHGOD, I thought I’d been hijacked and I called Mark in a panic and he said the website just needed to be renewed and he told me to breathe and...(flaps hands, doing an incredibly remarkable imitation of Big Bird having some sort of epileptic seizure) I think I’m gonna faint…or cry…or maybe vomit.”

Connor: “So…who’s Mark? Wait. Is he your co-worker with the awesome British accent that thinks he’s from Zimbabwe?”

Kathryn (Stares): “We’ve been over this. He is from Zimbabwe. And I don’t think he appreciated when you questioned his country of origin.”

Connor: “I’m just saying. He sounded very British to me.”

Kathryn: “Oh, yeah…because you’re such an expert on dialects. Can we get back to what’s important here?”

Connor: “Dinner?”

Kathryn: “What?” (Waves hand dismissively) “No. I also noticed I’ve got 600 posts in the hopper. This is number six-oh-one. I’m just missing everything…and now I have to finish the laundry I started at 5:30 this morning and finish that article that’s due….like, right now. I shouldn’t even be standing here talking to you.”

Connor: “Well, then…I’ll let you go.”

Kathryn: “But…”

Connor: “Chop, chop Mom. You really need to learn how to apply yourself.”

Kathryn: “I don’t want--“

Connor: “Sometimes, it’s not about what you want…it’s more about what you need.”

Kathryn: “Rolling Stones?”

Connor: “What??”

Kathryn (Sighs): “Never mind. Go back to your computer. Oh and my comment-thingie is being wonky, too. Mark's trying to help me figure out why.”

Connor (Staring at the monitor): “That’s nice. Hmmmm….”

And so it goes…three years down…hopefully many, many more to come. Please keep trying to comment…and I’ll try to be timely in responding!

Miss you. Love you. Mean it.


Gigi said...

Love you, mean it - right back at ya.

Life is crazy sometimes and those darn blog-anniversaries roll around faster and faster don't they? Which reminds the next couple of months remind me that I've got one coming up......

And don't even get me started on those darn kids that don't even seem concerned about our issues! I mean, come on....we worry about *their* issues....would some reciprocity be too hard!

allison said...

Miss you, love you too!
And life has been crazy lately.
Something about mercury in retrograde.

Ingwa said...

I wasn't upset about being asked where I was from in the slightest. It gives me an opportunity to explain my origins, which are pretty vast, so hard to pinpoint one particular identity. Hehe, and the simple shrug of the shoulders just makes me chuckle. I remember the days, of being young, that was so long ago...umm where was I oh yes. Good write Kathryn, and good to see the blog is back up :)

Alan W. Davidson said...

Happy Third, Kathryn! I think that you and Connor celebrated it in the perfect manner. You DID feed him, right?

Unknown said...

Happy Blogoversary! Miss you and love you too! Hang in there. Hopefully things will slow down soon.

Christopher said...

You are a blogging goddess. Congrats.

Vince said...

Happy third birthday. And for your 600+ essay.

Moonrayvenne said...

Well, congrats & Happy Blogoversary! I know how you feel! I need to get back to blogging & things always seem to get in my way! Things always get done somehow :) (((HUGS)))

Haven said...

Congrats on the Blogversary for sure. That's inspiring. So much for sympathy, eh? Don't let it get you down. All you can do is one thing at a time. Eventually it will all get done.

Kelly@MentalGarbage said...

Happy Blog-a-versary... Mine was last month and I totally forgot... oops! hahaha

sage said...

Happy blog-anniversary... My next big celebration will be a 1000 posts, which is about 2 years away as I am not posting as much as before. I love how you capture your conversations with your son!

Anonymous said...

Testing comments.
Anonymous Stalker Kathryn

Cathy Olliffe-Webster said...

It's the Safari - Safari, my computer program, nothing to do with British-speaking Mark from Zimbabwe, won't let me comment but Firefox will. Which bugs me, see, because at work I'm always defending Safari even though everyone is always putting it down, saying Firefox is better, which is obnoxious, and if I hear one more person disparage my Mac, seriously, I'm gonna lose it. So I'm kinda pissed that Firefox works, but, there it is.
Oh? This post has nothing to do with me? Ok... sorry...
Congratulations on THREE YEARS!!! Good for you!
My kids do the "What?" "Huh?" thing, too, and boy, it drives me even crazier than the Firefox fanatics at work. Sometimes you just wanna smack 'em. All of 'em.

Full-On-Forward said...

I Love Connor!




Anonymous said...

Three years!!!! Oh my! Aha blogsville is lucky to have had you for that long. Here's to more years of amazing insanity and shenanigans.


HulaBuns said...

3 years and 600 +1 posts!!! Wow! That's awesome! Keep on a blogging, we all love you! :)

Brasil said...

Wow, what a blog! I mean, you just have so many guts to go ahead and tell it like it is. You’re what blogging needs, an open minded superhero that isn’t afraid to tell it like it is. This is definitely something people need to be up on. Good luck in the future, man.

Kristy @Loveandblasphemy said...

I understand. We are busy women. But so worth the trouble! :)

Jerry said...

Hello? Can you hear me? How come your comment thingie poops out after 600 entries? Tired? Old? Your commenter has gone into retirement?

I wonder. Do you have anyone those commented on every blog? 600 comments from a single person? If so -- that is true love.

Hugs and third birthday kisses.

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