Thursday, October 2, 2008

Hey! Cut That Out!

Ah, the joys of moving into a new place.

There’s the coffee machine manual that’s gone missing, causing my morning coffee to automatically brew at the ungodly hour of 4:45am.

There’s the fact that two and a half weeks later, I still can’t get my car into the garage (yeah, I know….poor me...but can’t you almost hear my car weeping in the wee hours of the morning? "Helllp meeee....I'm freeeezzzing....")

Did I tell you that I’d bought mums to adorn my new front entryway? I can’t honestly say I’ve ever bought them before, as they are obviously of the season-before-winter-variety of flower and therefore I become very melancholy whenever I spot them. (My friend Susan is saying “Uh huh…I’m down with that.” I can almost hear her.)

I can also now report that I won’t be purchasing them again. Here’s what I found this

What's painfully absent is the full-blooming-bouquet-of-heavenly-gold I'd had when I went to sleep last night. Then I saw this:

If you listen carefully, you can almost hear the snickering...and can picture the haphazard, picky projectile-way some animal threw this somehow-unsatisfactory-tidbit aside for the juicier pickings...

Later, I caught the "alleged" culprit:

Does she look like she cares that she's been caught chomping on my front lawn?

I think not.

I’ve heard people talking about issues with deer eating their plants/annuals/flowers…and I always thought “Geez…give it up, already. You’re fighting a losing battle…just bow out gracefully and move on.”

Even though I’m living it, I still feel that way. It just seems to me that if they wanna eat it, they’re gonna eat it. Unless you’re willing to sit watch over your plants all night long... garnishing some sort of really big, intimidating weapon at the ready to scare the crap out of them, (and remember: they're bigger than most of us) just let it go. Life is too short….and thanks to the deer, so are my flowers.


On the other end of the spectrum, you have my new local cable company…who is evidently extremely fond of me. They may actually be bordering on stalking:

This is an awful lot of mail for 2 weeks worth, don’t you think? Are you dying to know what all these solicitations have to say? I’ll have to get back to you on that, as I’ve yet to open any of them. I can tell they’re not bills by the postage amount, so they’re relegated to “back burner” status….c'est la vie.

By the time most of you read this post, it’ll be Friday…I can almost hear your contented sighs and glimpse your hopeful smiles from here.

Here’s wishing you the most satisfying of weekends: the kind that combines both the satisfaction of accomplishing those weekend-warrior chores with the joyful contentment that can only come from kicking back and enjoying a big ‘ole serving of serious self-indulgence.

Now, get to it.

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