Tuesday, May 27, 2008

But Wait! There's More!

My sons are just learning what we’ve been making fun of for years…that advertising is not always so subtle. I can still remember the “Crazy Eddie” radio ads…does anyone else remember these? Granted, you have to be from New Yawk to have heard them…but they were the most obnoxious ads. And yet…I still remember them. Long after Crazy Eddie passed to the great retail beyond….along with Caldor and Alexander’s department stores.

Did you know that there are more car commercials on teevee than any other product? Do you think the car companies are aware of how expensive their products are?? Maybe someone should notify them of the fact that we’re not changing our cars as often as we change our toilet paper rolls. These people need to take a serious “chill pill”. Stop inundating us with ads…it’s not gonna make us buy it any quicker. And nobody really believes there’s a “sale going on now” at the dealership, so cut it out already.

Sometimes, I truly believe that repetition is simply….repetition. You know, we New Yorkers are not stupid. If you put quotations on a rave, it does not mean anyone actually ever said it, (much less thought it)…and if you say “experts” prefer it 2 to 1 over the leading brand, we’re gonna pick up on the fact that “experts” is in quotations, which brings us full circle to the fact that we’re still not buying it.

I understand that some people are gullible…but I think they think we’re complete idiots. I’m immediately suspect of any product that is “not available in stores”…there has to be a reason why they don’t want the general public to get their hands on too much of it. Maybe it’s toxic in bulk…or maybe it’s not yet approved by The Federal Drug Administration to be used within a 50-mile radius of pets, trees or anything with any hope of reproducing.

This is where the expression “buyer beware” originates, I’m thinkin’.

Connor (age 11) recently pointed out an ad for something called Mighty Putty…it was on The Cartoon Network and Connor knew the entire commercial by heart. This concerns me on so many levels. Why are they only advertising on a network viewed by children under the age of 14? And, is NASA aware of this product? I mean, the ad shows that it can transform itself from what looks to me like Silly Putty into a product that when stuck onto a trailer hitch can pull an eighteen-wheeler! It seems to me that our National Space Program should be taking an active interest in acquiring this stuff. Surely Mighty Putty could do wonders for fixing that broken satellite that’s interfering with my ability to pick up my favorite news station in my car…

And if you order in the next 12 minutes, they’ll throw in a blender that can fold your laundry and will translate anything from English to Dutch!


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