I was psyched at the prospect of a brand new month…ripe with its possibilities of warmer temperatures and balmy breezes. Yes, I realize this is New York and no, I’m not delusional…not about this, anyway. Hey, a gal’s gotta have a dream, right?
Kathryn: “So, February…you’re probably wondering why I’ve asked you here.”
February: “Bite me.”
Kathryn: “Wow. That’s not very...civilized of you. I haven’t even asked you a que--…”
February: “Yeah, yeah. I’ve heard it all before. Everybody’s got an issue with me. Sure, I got Valentine’s Day…but then I gotta hear 'waa-waa' from every lonely Tom, Dick & Harry. And who the hell came up with the non-holiday of Groundhog Day? I mean, way to boost my street creds.” (Sniffs loudly)
Kathryn: “Well, I’m thinking Punxsutawney Phil and his supporters would beg to differ. Plus, you’ve got a couple of Presidents birthdays thrown in there…”
February: “Big whoop. With Easter breathing down my neck sometimes as early as March, my rep for giving the kiddies a week off has been reduced to a long freakin’ weekend. What the hell?”
Kathryn: “Look, I don’t know what your problem is but you really shouldn’t be messing with the religious holidays. It’s bad karma…”
February: “Bite me.”
Kathryn: “WTF? What is your problem?? Wait…is this because...you’re...short? ‘Cause, really, no-one is even going th—“
February: “I do not appreciate being used as a dumping ground for an extra day once every couple-a-years. I just wanna be like everybody else. 30 days or 31. Is that so much to ask? Happy Birthday to a couple of dead presidents and waking up a rodent so he may or may not see his shadow. Way to feel special...”
Kathryn: “Is that what this is about? Feeling special?? You’ve got Chinese New Year and Waitangi Day, ya know. And my brother and one of my sisters both have birthdays this month. Hell, Clinton’s birthday is this month…and an uber-special little bundle of joy from one of my closest friends is due to arrive this month as well. When it comes to birthdays, you rock!”
February: “Really? Ya think so?? I’m so tired of feeling like a throwaway month…like they’ve shorted me down to 28 days to just get me the hell over with…”
Kathryn: “Aw. I’m so sure that’s not the case. Those calendar-making people probably had to shorten you up to keep all the other months from being green with envy.”
February: “Yeah, I hate green. March is always shoving St. Patrick’s Day down my throat…if he didn’t have the beginning of Daylight Savings Time, he’d be nothing.”
Kathryn: “Well…not nothing. I mean, at least winter’s got a chance in hell of ending in March…”
February: (Sighs deeply) “Bite me.”
***Connor (14) has picked the winners of the Googlicious Giveaway! Winners will be announced next post. Thank you to all who’ve entered…and thank you for sending Inside…Out some Facebook loooove.***
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