Saturday, September 26, 2009

Oops. In Trouble Again.

Picture it: Middle School….Open House….parents acting like responsible adults…chewing gum, talking loudly in the halls, whilst walking on the left…you get the idea.

I’d barely escaped with my life from the snake wrapped around Connor’s science teacher and now I was walking around with my barbeque bugs in my Neosporin case.

I was almost there….two more periods to go and I was outta there. When we entered the class for honors math (yeah, I’m bragging…just a bit), we were told to take the index card with our child’s name off the table.

I sat down next to a dad. You don’t usually see too many dads at these things…especially during the day. We smiled and nodded in greeting and turned our attention to the teacher.

Teacher asked us to verify that the name and contact info on the card were correct. I don’t know what he said after that, as I was intent on adding my cell number and email address to my card. A moment later, I hear the dad next to me chuckle. I glanced over at him thinking, “It doesn’t take much to amuse you, eh buddy? Name and address is funny to you?” He looks at me and says out of the corner of his mouth, “Turn the card over.”

The teacher’s still droning about grade curves and being prepared for class…and then he calls our attention to the back of our index cards. He explains that the students were to write what part of math they struggled with, so they could set that as a goal to overcome for the year:

At this moment, the dad starts to laugh. I sneak him a sqinty look and he says, “Look at the hobbies on the bottom. My daughter put 'shopping, trying on clothes and going to the mall' as her top three.”

Now the teacher calls our attention to the “hobbies” portion, explaining that he’d like his students to understand that “math is everywhere…in everything you do”.

This is when I glance at my son’s hobbies…and I felt the laughter bubbling up in my throat. I broke into a huge grin and covered my mouth with my hand in a vain attempt to hold back the inevitable burst of laughter. The dad’s watching me and he whispers, “What?” and I flip the card in his direction for him to see.

He looks….and he starts to laugh. Then I start to laugh. I looked down at the desk in an effort to control myself, but I could still peripherally see him shaking…

STOP!” I whisper…"You’re gonna get us in trouble." He says “Let me see it,” and I casually pass the card across to him.

I hear him start to snicker and he hands the card back.

“Did you see where he ran out of room and wrote down the card?” he whispers…and his voice is shaking….he sounded like he was either going to explode or stroke out.

“Take a picture,” he says.

“Okay,” I say.

We’ve missed a good portion of the teacher’s lecture at this point…and I’ve now got the daunting task of finding the “take a picture” option on my cell. I’m adjusting…moving in closer...framing it out…and I hit “take picture”.

CLICK!!!!!

(I’d forgotten to put my cell on “mute”.)

20 heads turn simultaneously and look at me in surprise.

Teacher says “Excuse me? Is there a problem?”

I apologized…just as the bell rang. See Connor’s list below. Now, how do you suppose his #1 hobby can be translated into a math equation? Anyone??

Ziare Gratis said...

Nice Interests

kathryn said...

Ziare Gratis: Thanks for commenting. Appreciate it!

Almost 40 Divorced/Remarried Working MOM said...

Sleep is a popular hobby with the bosy....

Courtney said...

First, I wanted to say I ran across your blog and it has made me chuckle, giggle, laugh and all of the above. I read the first part of the open house night and waited for this second part.
As for the math maybe an equation of the amount of sleep he gets to the amount of sleep he should get. I have no idea, math wasn't my greatest friend in school.

kathryn said...

Almost 40 Divorced: Well, I've never known anyone to love sleep as much as Connor does. He once told me, "The only good thing about morning is sleeping through it."
Thanks for the flw/comment!

kathryn said...

Courtney: Thank you very much! I'm glad you enjoyed it. I'm also glad you checked back...I'd meant to put a dislcimer on "Floppy" post to say I'd finish the MS story on Saturday. We may never know Teacher's take on math's influence on sleep...I didn't dare stick around to ask him.
Thanks for flw/comment!

Afrodite said...

Greate blog, your coment about sleeping is so interesting!

MeanDonnaJean said...

Exactly HOW old is this kid? He's a damn good speller.....'n apparently, wants to work on bein' a damn good sleeper, too!

Well, there's another lil' photo goodie for ya to show all yer friends 'n embarrass the crap outta him when he's older. We Moms are awfully good at doin' stuff like that.

FYI: just in case yer wonderin', I stopped by here from Lou's place. Was lookin' for some more good stuff to gravitate towards, 'n I think I found one! ;-)

kathryn said...

Afrodite: Thank you!

MeanDonnaJean: He just started 7th grade...and has terrible handwriting by his own account. I personally don't care...isn't that prerequisite for being a doctor? He has no clue I've blogged about it, actually. I usually tell him but somehow, I don't think he'd approve. I LOVE Lou! She's wonderful...and she comes from the land of my Cloudy (takes gulp)-
Thanks for flw/comment!

Bobby Allan said...

Sleep? Hey, is he MY son??

How about the Dad? Was he a hottie?

Anonymous said...

Haha....That's happened to me before. Well not exactly like that, but I was in a situation where I had to control my laughter over something in a group of people and finally couldn't. Lovely hobbies your son has btw. XD Sleep is awesome.

kathryn said...

Hey Chrissie! Yeah....he was okay. Honestly, I always just assume they're married and sorta zone out on the rest. I guess that means he couldn't have been THAT cute, right?

Insanity: I agree abt the sleep. I loooove my sleep. I can't seem to get enough. And as far as that uncontrollable laughter? Sometimes, ya just gotta give into it. Thanks for commenting!

Marissa the Conservative said...

I love how you two were like kids in class ( or like me in my friends in honors math, yeah I'm bragging a bit *smiles*). The part with the phone is something that would happen with that 1 kid in 1 of my classes that forgets to put his phone on mute & a random, embarrassing song interrupts the teacher because some random person decided to call him at 10:30 in the morning, forgetting class was in session.

kathryn said...

--the Joker's Jerk: Ha! I knew you could relate! I've got the "take picture" setting set to make a loud sound like an old-fashioned film camera...and I never realized how freakin' loud it is! ('Course, I'm usually outside when I use it)
Do they confiscate ringing cells during class? We actually have a scrambler on the roof of the bldg-you cudn't get a call if you wanted to. Tks for commenting!

S Elle said...

Sleep is on the top of my list too

: )

Frank Lee Tru said...

I love your blog it was so funny. I swear the things kids say and do. It is moments like that with my childern that make me take a minute to pull out my phone, call my mother and inform her that I am paying for my raising ;0)~

kathryn said...

Crazy Spice Lady: I think too many of us are sleep-deprived...that's why we crave it. Don't you think?
Thanks for commenting!

Frank Lee Tru:Thank you! Yeah, I hear that a lot....how kids (usually boys!) say that "Mom said someday I'd pay for the hell I put her through with my own version of ME"! HA! Of course, I was a perfect angel...
Thanks for the comment/flw!

Gay Guy said...

I've never thought of sleep as a hobby, rather more of a necessity. I've never been a great sleeper, either in quantity or quality. I felt fine for a long time, then, boom, my body reminds me that I am not longer a college kid.

Anonymous said...

Always hated math, I was lucky to stay awake during class. Teacher has been warned, right?

Inappropriate places to laugh uncontrollably:

#1)Church - I don't know why things are so dang funny in church, but they are. I've embarrassed my pastor by not being able to control my laughter during services.

#2)Basketball games - This is especially inappropriate when you are supposed to be watching your child play. It's really bad when more people are watching you than the game.

#3)Anywhere someone has fallen - It is a curse. But if someone busts it, I'm dying. I will try to check on their well being but it doesn't always work out that way. I'm smiling now thinking of it. (Sick, sick, sick)

Needless to say, I can relate.

Angie

Rambles'N'Shambles said...

Sleep, the hobby of the young and old alike.

You could probably tell your son the amount of time it takes to enter R.E.M and how long R.E.M lasts for, that's kinda like maths, it involve numbers at least~

Mary from the Prairie said...

Hey, evilteenietiff - I was gonna go there with my comment!

But yes, studying dreams and REM cycles, and all the algebraic algorithms that go with those wave patterns. Then there is trying to record dreams once he wakes up and the whole dream interpretation process.

(btw, I saw a headline on yahoo news this morning that a recent study shows that lack of sleep can cause damage to the brain, leading to Alzheimer's. Connor may be on to something there ... )

Annette Marie said...

liked your blog thanks. I can relate was at Open House myself recently, I can relate :)

kathryn said...

Hey Gay Gay!How' one of my favorite men? Yeah, i hear that. 1) I do not believe any 12-yo should look at sleep as a hobby. It's just not right. 2) I used to be able to sleep till 10:30 if allowed...up until about 6 months ago. Now, it's 6:00, no matter what the day. Of course, Ambien and Xanax are a sleeper's best friend...with the occasional breaks to break dependence that is.
I'm glad you commented!

Fumbling Confidence: Angie...it's not your fault that you can see the humor in just about everything! Let's face it: most of the clips on America's funnies home videos are of ppl getting hurt, so you're not the only one.
I find that thinking of something sad does not work AT ALL. You?

evilteenietiff:Very good point! REM sleep is the best...and I think it's what keeps our brains from turning to mush. I think I read that somewhere....thanks for the insightful comment.

Mary from the Prairie: Wow! That yahoo news story sounds intersting...I'll have to check that out. I'll let YOU explain the mathmatics behind the REM...ya lost me! BTW: I can't reciprocate a comment on your blog...wanted you to know I tried. Thanks for the post here...home you'll visit again.

susan F said...

Boy, Connor sure DOES love his sleep! That would have made me burst out in laughter too.

kathryn said...

SusanF: Well, you KNEW this already!(About Connor)

kathryn said...

Annette Marie: Thanks for commenting and for the kind words. I hope you visit again.

nikkilee_44 said...

Hey I know just how you feel but i am the student in this and my parents don't come to open houses because i am a senior......... thats ok tho i remember my open houses as a kid and it takes me back..... great blog!!

mogcat said...

Nice One!

LiberatedButterfly said...

i don't get the equation, math was never my strongest subject. but ha ha ha ha ha anyway!! hey-toxic.blogspot.com

Anonymous said...

Geez, Kathryn, it's kids like you and Mr. Dad that make me question why I ever became a teacher. : p

No, seriously, that's hilarious. Your son and I have a #1 hobby in common these days.

kathryn said...

nikkilee_44: Thank you! A senior? You're almost there! The top of the heap! I loooved being a senior! Thanks for commenting & flwg.

Mogcat: Thanks for commenting!

Toxic: Me, neither. As long as HE gets it, we're golden. Thanks for commenting!

~:C:~ Hey you! So, we're your worst nightmare, eh? I'm sure Teacher is glad we're not there every day. Man, sometimes I think most of the planet is sleep-deprived...I've hit a nerve w/this one. Thanks for the comment!

jh said...

I bet he gets it from his mother!

snoble24 said...

cute. i dont see why it was funny though

kathryn said...

jh: Well, I nevah. Well, maybe....OKAY, YES...he gets it from me. Are you happy now?!

snoble24: Would you ever put "sleep" as a hobby on something? Like an application?? It doesn't exactly make you look...motivated, if you know what I mean....

Annabelle said...

How funny! What are the chances you'll be more lenient with your son next time he gets in trouble for talking in class?

kathryn said...

Annaelle: Yeah, you've got a good point. (grudgingly) I guess I'll have to cut him some slack, but he's much better behaved than I am, me thinks.
Thanks for commenting!

JP said...

It's quite obvious. He needs math to calculate the optimal time needed to clean his room/do dishes/other menial chores assigned by the evil overlords/etc in order to have ample time to slay... whatever it is kids are slaying these days.

Jen T said...

Hahaha! "CLICK!" At least it wasn't set to one of those other noises like "SAY CHEESE" or something.

kathryn said...

JP: Good point, my friend! Somehow, I don't think Teacher is gonna want to explain it that way...the kids'll never want to get out of bed! (Except for the slaying part....)

lifelove'n'wine: HA! Oh, good point! Could you imagine?! That old-fashioned (and LOUD) camera-sound was bad enough. So embarrassing!

Jasofme said...

LOL man oh man.. That kinda looks like my son's list too!! I just love how you write because I can picture every moment.. hmm wonder if that is because in some point and time I too have been there!! Maybe the teacher can show your son how many hours a day he wastes on his favorite hobbies? LOL...Have a great day!!

kathryn said...

Jasofme: I doubt very much that ANYONE could convince my son that sleeping's a waste of his time. Man, does he love to sleep! Thanks SO MUCH for the kind words...it really means a lot! I'll stop by and visit tonight-

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